Presenting Doctor Who!
by BowTiesAreCool01
Summary: The Doctor and all his friends and companions are stuck in a room. They are forced to watch his life story since his ninth incarnation. What will happen when Jack and River are stuck in a room together. Why not read to find out. Summary sucks I know. Crossover between Doctor Who/SJA/Torchwood. Just give it a try R&R please. MULTI-CHAPTER. Rated T just to be safe
1. Chapter 1

**First fanfic be kind please. Chapter One: the meeting.**

**Disclaimer: unfortunately I do not own Doctor who and I envy the person that does**

Clara, the Doctor, Angle and Artie were on their way to clom. They were going because the Doctor had promised to take his companions to clom one day. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Amy and Rory were sat down in their house in the 1930's. Amy was writing her book, Summer Falls, and Rory was reading the newspaper. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

River was sat in Stormcage. She was reading through her diary. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped her and she was teleported away.

Sarah Jane was sat in the attic with Mr Smith and K-9. They had just saved the Earth from the slitheen. Luke, Clyde and Rani came in with some cups of tea. They sat and talked and wondered what their next big adventure would be. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Rose was out shopping with her husband (John, the human-timelord metacrisis) and her mum, Jackie. They were laughing and talking about the time Pete - Rose's dad - got trapped inside a massive gingerbread house by accident. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Mickey and Martha were sat eating a take-away. They were having their favourite. Chinese. They were watching: Would I Lie To You. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Donna was sat with her granddad talking about the time the daleks stole the Earth. They weren't good times. Donna had recovered her memory after the incident with the Master. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Jack was working away at torchwood with Gwen and Ianto. They had tracked down some alien activity and were getting ready to go check it out. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Madame Vastra was sat with Jenny talking about the Great Intelligence. Strax came in with some cups of tea and something to eat. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

Craig and Sophie were sat on the sofa. Craig was holding Alfie (a.k.a Stormageddon dark Lord of all) and Sophie was talking about her day. Alfie had fallen asleep on Craig's shoulder. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped them and they were teleported away.

The 10th doctor was zooming around the TARDIS. He had just lost Donna and was pretty upset about it. He was rambling to himself. He didn't know what to do or where to go. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped him and he was teleported away.

The 9th Doctor was bored. He had just dropped Rose off at home for a bit whilst she visited her mother. He was waiting for her to get back. He did have a time machine but he didn't want to risk going to far in the future like he did that time when Rose was gone for 12 months. Suddenly, a bright light enveloped him and he was teleported away.

The room had blue walls just like the TARDIS. It was silent and there was a massive group of sofas and one tv. Out of nowhere a big group of people appeared. The silence was penetrated with shouts from the scared people.

''QUIET!'' The eleventh Doctor shouted. Everyone turned to look at him. A few people waved in recognition. ''Ok so everyone calm down. It seems that everyone here I have met or seen since my ninth incarnation. Can everyone take a seat and I will introduce everyone. Firstly, I am the Doctor. 11th incarnation. Can I come up here please.'' Some people had confused looks on their faces. Others muttered but your are already up there. Up stepped a man in a leather jacket with big ears and the other wore a pinstriped suit and had spiky hair.

''This is the ninth version of me.'' The eleventh Doctor pointed to the man in the leather jacket. '' I regenerated into him. The tenth version of myself.'' He said pointing to the man in the pinstriped suit. ''I have no idea if this will cause a paradox or not but at the moment who cares? Call me eleven, ten ten and nine nine so we don't get confused.'' Everyone looked puzzled but eleven ignored it. Ten and nine sat down.

''Sarah and you lot come up here,'' eleven exclaimed pointing at Luke, Clyde and Rani. 'So everyone this is Sarah Jane Smith who travelled with me in my 4th incarnation and this is her son Luke and his friends Clyde and Rani,'' He said pointing to each of them in turn. They sat down.

''Torchwood team get up here now. This is Captain Jack Harkness, Gwen and Ianto.'' They sat down. The introductions continued. He introduced Rose, John, Jackie, Martha, Mickey, Donna, Wilf, Amy, Rory, Clara, Angie, Artie, Madame Vastra, Jenny, Strax, Craig, Sophie and Alfie (who kept insisting that he had changed his name back to Stormageddon but Doctor was the only one one who could understand because he spoke baby). River then stood up and walked over to the Doctor.

''And finally this is River Song. Clara, Amy,Rory, Jenny, Madame Vastra and Strax already know she is also my wife.'' The Doctor said slightly smirking as murmurs spread around the room. Donna, who was always going to be the loudest person, said

''So that's who she is. I was always wondering because we never found out in the library did we?'' The pained look on eleven' s face when she mentioned the library shut her right up.

''Wait, so your married? Your not Clara's boyfriend then?'' Artie asked eleven and he shook his head.

"Oh and also her parents are Amy and Rory," Eleven told the group and Amy quietly muttered something about eleven being the worst son in law in the history of the universe. Sarah Jane looked over at Amy and whispered to her

"So your his mother in law?" Amy just nodded her head. She didn't trust her mouth at that moment. When everyone had quietened down, they noticed a massive tv attached to the wall. Everyone took a seat as it came to life.

''Welcome friends and family of The Doctor. You are here to watch the adventures of The Doctor and his companions. You will be watching from The Doctor's ninth incarnation. However, you have ten minutes to greet friends and meet new people before the show starts. If you start to talk, the tv will automatically pause. When you stop talking, the tv will resume. Doctor, in some of the episodes that are upsetting for you please move to the back of the room and there will be a sound booth to go in and wait quietly until the scene is over. After you have watched the episodes we will watch the episodes of Sarah Jane's adventures and Torchwood. The seating plan is Nine, Rose, John, Ten, Martha, Mickey, Donna, Wilf, Sarah Jane, Luke, Clyde, Rani, Jack, Gwen, Ianto, Madame Vastra, Jenny, Strax, Craig, Sophie and Alfie, Amy, Rory, River, Eleven, Clara, Angie and Artie. Nine has just done the slitheen in Downing street, Rose and John have have been stuck on the parallel world for a year and a half. They have been married for half a year. Ten has just lost Donna and is alone in the TARDIS. Martha and Mickey have been married a year and the Doctor knocked the sontaran out for them 2 months ago. Donna and Wilf have seen the Master change all the humans to look like him. Sarah Jane, Luke, Clyde and Rani have just defeated some slitheen. Craig, Sophie and Alfie are just after the Doctor came with the cybermen. Jack, Gwen and Ianto are just after the Earth was stolen by the daleks. Amy and Rory are after the weeping and they left the Doctor. Madame Vastra, Jenny, Strax, Eleven, Clara, River, Angie and Artie are post Trensalore. Enjoy! From Sexy..."

The Doctor chuckled when the tv said 'From Sexy...' and everyone turned to look at him.

"Sexy is the TARDIS."

Everyone got up and mingled. Eleven managed to kidnap Alfie and introduce him to everyone as if he was his own son. Finally, Craig managed to get him back. There was a lot of hugging involved (epsecially between Donna and Jack) as everyone reunited or said hello to the people they haven't met. Once everyone had sat back down, the tv flashed to life.

"Here it is!" Jack said and everyone shushed him.

**So what do you think? Review please and I will try and update as soon as possible. Thanks to WaterlooRoad01 and Ausllyxlover for their help with the chapter.**


	2. Chapter 2: Rose

So guys here is the second chapter. Thank you to everyone who has read it means a lot. Also thanks to everyone for the great feedback. Sorry for the long wait for this chapter. I had a lot of homework and stuff to do but I tried to edit it as often as I could. Also, my internet broke :( I will try and update as soon as possible from now on.

If you like this story read **Watching Doctor Who: Series 5** by **Nikki Pond**. It is an absolutely amazing story. It is when Clara, Eleven, John (10.5), Rose, Amy, Rory, River and Nikki (the author) are in Nikki's living room watching Doctor Who from series 5. I have not stolen her ideas or anyone else's ideas who have done stories similar to mine.

**Guest:**In response to your review. I am planning to try and do every episode.

Hope you enjoy the chapter and please leave a review or follow or favourite the story.

** DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWD WDWDWDWDWDW**

Eleven had managed to kidnap Alfie again and he was now sleeping on Eleven' s shoulder. Alfie let out a small yawn and everyone smiled at him. River, Eleven and Alfie were snuggling up like a family. Rose was slightly jealous but ignored it and watched the episode as it started.

**(Time vortex comes on with the credits)**

"Doctor, is that what the time vortex looks like?" A few people asked and the doctors just shook their heads as they had no idea.

**Camera pans over the planet Earth and zooms right into London. Continue zooming into Rose's alarm clock, which reads 7:30. Rose hits it to stop it beeping and jumps out of bed.**

_**Rose picks up her bag, gives her mum a**__** kiss on the cheek and reaches for her keys.**_

**ROSE: Bye!**

**JACKIE: See you later! **_**Jackie sips her tea and picks up the phone. Rose jogs down the stairs of the block of flats where she lives. Rose gets off a bus. Rose carries a pile of clothes through her work. In her lunch hour, Rose and Mickey sit next to a fountain, having a laugh, eating and kissing.**_

"There I am!" Mickey exclaimed and he waved at the screen at himself. A few people just laughed at him but Martha gave home a quick kiss on the cheek to make him stop.

_**Th**__**ey get ready to go.**_

**ROSE: Bye!**

_**She is back in Henricks.**_

**LOUD SPEAKER: This is a customer announcement: the store will be closing in five minutes. Thank you.**

_**Rose is about to leave.**_

**SECURITY GUARD: **_**(hands her a package)**_**Oi!**

_**Rose takes the package looking not looking very **__**happy and enters a lift.**_

"Lifts are horrible, Alfie can't stand the sound of them." Sophie told everyone and Alfie started to cry at the sound of it. Craig looked as though he wanted to take him back to comfort him but Eleven did his shushy thing and he went quiet.

"Are you sure you won't teach me how to do that doctor?" Craig asked. Eleven just shook his head .

_****__**When the lift pings, she is in the basement. **__**  
**_**ROSE: ****Wilson? **_**(goes further down the corridor) **_**Wilson, I've got the lottery money. Wilson? (**_**knocks on a door that says 'HP Wilson CEO') **_**You there? Look, I can't hang about 'cause they're closing the shop. Wilson! **_**(to herself) **_**Uhh, come on!**

"Very impatient aren't we?" Jack asked determinedly trying to wind Rose up. John went to stand up but Rose pulled him down. Madame Vastra and Strax looked on interested as they didn't know about human love and trying to make people angry or annoyed.

_**There is a sudden sound further along the corridor. Rose snaps her head in the direction it has come from.**_

**ROSE: ****Hello? Hello, Wilson, it's Rose. Hello? Wil- Wilson?**

_**She stops outside a fire door for a moment, and then opens it, and find herself in a room that is used for storing shop dummies. She turns the light on and walks further into the room.**_

**ROSE: ****Wilson? Wilson? ****  
**_**She tries another door at the side. The fire door through which she entered closes suddenly. Shocked, she runs back and shakes the handles, but they will not open. There is a sound from behind her. **__**  
**_**ROSE: ****Is that someone mucking about? **_**(goes back into the room) **_**Who is it?**

"A plastic dummy which is probably an alien or controlled by aliens" Clyde told the group as Rose just shook her head.

_**Behind her, a dummy slowly turns its head on its own.**_

_**Rose turns around to see it step out of its alcove and towards her. She backs away.**_

**ROSE: ****Heh... you got me, very funny.**

_**The dummy keeps quiet and keeps moving towards her. Two more join it.**_

**ROSE: ****Right, I've got the joke! Who's idea was this? Was it Derek's?**

"Would you like me to blow up this 'Derek' ma'am?" Strax asked Madame Vastra. Eleven answered for her:

"No Strax, when will you learn that not everything has to be blown up?"

"Never sir."

"Don't call me sir."

_**The dummies still move forward - another comes from behind. **__**  
**_**ROSE: ****Derek, is this you?**

"So Rose, when do we meet Derek?"

"Shut up Jack."

_**All of the dummies are now alive. Rose backs up away and falls over a box. She pulls herself up and backs backs up against a wall. The dummy lifts its arm to hit her. Rose screws her face up ready for the strike, when a hand grabs hers. Rose opens her eyes and turns her head to look at the owner of the hand.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Run**

"His favourite word is: RUN. He still says it it's annoying." Clara said.

"You can't talk miss annoying and bossy pants." Eleven told Clara.

"Yeah, she is pretty annoying," Angie laughed high-fiving Eleven as she said it.

"She's bossy too!" Artie added.

"I would be quiet if I were you. Otherwise I will be telling your father about the incident with the lamp." Clara whispered to Angie. That made her shut up right away.

_**They run**__** through a fire exit. The dummies are following. The Doctor leads her into a lift. The doors close on one of the dummy's arms. The Doctor pulls it off and the doors close.**_

**ROSE: ****You pulled his arm off!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yep! **_**(throws it to rose) **_**Plastic**

******ROSE: ****Very clever, nice trick! Who were they then, students? Is this a student thing or what?**

"Why would they be students?" Madame Vastra asked, perplexed.

"Because students dress up and mess around and do stupid things." Ianto told her.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Why would they be students? ****  
****ROSE: ****I don't know...****  
****THE DOCTOR: ****Well, you said it! Why students?**

**ROSE:****'Cause... to get that many people dressed up and being silly... they gotta be students. **_**The Doctor smiles. He likes her.**_

"He likes you already. I think that's a new record!" Jack said to Rose. She and Gwen (who hardly knew the Doctor) let out a small laugh.

**THE DOCTOR: ****That makes sense! Well done.**

**ROSE: ****Thanks.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****They're not students.**

**ROSE: ****Whoever they are, when Wilson finds them, he's gonna call the police.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Who's Wilson?**

**ROSE: ****Chief electrician.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Wilson's dead.**

"Nice way to break it to her you big idiot!" Donna went up to nine and hit him round the back of the head. All the Doctors said

"Ow!" and lifted a hand to the back of their head. Once Donna hat sat back down, Wilf told her not to do it again. He still felt like he owes the Doctor something after he saved him from the radiation.

_**He walks out of the lift. Rose follows him.**_

**ROSE: ****That's just not funny, that's sick!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Hold on! **_**(pushes Rose to the side) **_**Mind your eyes.**

_**He disables the lift with his sonic screwdriver.**_

**ROSE: ****I've had enough of this now!**

_**The Doctor walks off.**_

"RUDE!"

**ROSE: ****Who are you, then? Who's that lot down there? I said, who are they?**

"You want to know who I am. I am the Doctor!" Eleven said in a deep voice. River tried to hold in her laugh but burst out laughing over her husband's silliness. He figured the only way to shut her up was to kiss her. Whilst they were kissing, Rose felt a massive amount of jealousy and hurt mixed into one.

**THE DOCTOR: ****They're made of plastic. Living plastic creatures. They're being controlled by a relay device in the roof. Which would be a great big problem if I didn't have this. **_**(shows her an electronic device)**_** So! **_**(opens fire exit for Rose) **_**I'm going to go up there and blow them up, and I might well die in the process. But don't worry about me, no. Go home, go on! Go and have your lovely beans on toast.**

"Beans on toast?" Everyone shouted except for Rose and the three doctors.

_**Rose goes through the door.**_

**THE DOCTOR****: Don't tell anyone about this, because if you do, you'll get them killed.**

_**He closes the door. Rose turns away looking slightly bemused. It opens again.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I'm the Doctor, by the way, what's your name?**

**ROSE: ****Rose.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Nice to meet you, Rose. Run for your life.**

"Nice way to say goodbye Doctor. 'Run for your life!'"

"Well you know, I do like to be different Rani." Eleven and Ten said at the same time.

_**He shuts the door again. Rose runs. Outside, everyone is oblivious to what is going on. Rose is distracted and nearly gets herself run over by a taxi.**_

"BE CAREFUL!" Jack, Amy and Rory shouted at the same time at the tv.

"You do know that she is sitting right there." Jenny exclaimed pointing at Rose.

_******TAXI DRIVER: ****Watch it!**_

_**Rose proceeds to get as far away from the building as possible and looks back just in time to see the top floor blow up.**_

"I love big explosions. They can really wind you up!" River said to Eleven. He looked like he was about to protest until Jack said

"Will you two please stop flirting?"

"You can't talk!"

_**She runs home - past a police box.**_

"SEXY!"

_**News 24 is on the television. Rose is sat on the sofa, watching it.**_

**REPORTER: ****The whole of Central London has been closed off as police investigate the fire. Earlier reports in the...**

_**The dummy's arm is lying on a chair. Jackie walks in holding a phone to her ear.**_

**JACKIE: ****I know, it's on the telly! It's everywhere! She's lucky to be alive!**

"Trust Jackie to over exaggerate!"

_**(hands Rose a mug) **_**Honestly, it's aged her. Skin like an old bible. Walking in now you'd think I was HER daughter! Oh and here's himself...**

_**Mickey appears in the doorway**_

**MICKEY: **_**(to Rose) **_**I've been phoning your mobile, you could've been dead! It's on the news and everything! I can't believe that your shop went up!**

_**He hugs her.**_

**ROSE: ****I'm alright, honestly, I'm fine! Don't make a fuss.**

**MICKEY: ****Well, what happened?**

**ROSE: ****I don't know!**

"You lied. So that's what happened." Mickey said to Rose who gave him an apologetic smile.

**MICKEY: ****What was it though, what caused it?**

**ROSE: ****I wasn't in the shop, I was outside, I didn't see anything...**

"Do all humans lie this often?" Luke asked his mum. Sarah Jane just shook her head.

******JACKIE: **_**(walking in)**_**It's Debbie on the other end, she knows a man from the Mirror - five hundred quid for an interview!**

**ROSE: ****Oh that's brilliant! Give it here!**

_**She takes the phone and hangs it up.**_

Everyone laughed at that except Rose. Martha, Donna, Amy and Clara were beginning to like her even more. They could see he chose his companions well.

_**JACKIE: ****Well, you've gotta find some way of making money. Your jobs kaput and I'm not bailing you out. **__**(phone rings again, Jackie answers) **_**Beth! She's alive! **_**(leaves room)**_**I tell ya, sue for compensation! She was within seconds of death...**

"Jackie, Jackie, Jackie!"

**MICKEY: ****What're you drinking? Tea? No, no no, that's no good, that's no good. You're in shock, you need something stronger.**

**ROSE: ****Why?**

**MICKEY: ****You deserve a proper drink, you and me, we're going down the pub, my treat. How about it?**

**ROSE:**_**(smiling) **_**Is there a match on?**

**MICKEY: ****I'm just thinking about you, babe!**

**ROSE: ****There's a match on, ain't there.**

**MICKEY: ****Well, that's not the point. We could catch the last five minutes.**

"Oh, Mickey. Trust you to want to go to the pub when a match is on." Martha said, as she shook her head.

**ROSE: ****Go on then. I'm fine, really. Go. Get rid of that...**

_**She gestures to the dummy's arm. Mickey points to his lips. Rose gives him a kiss. He pushes her back onto the chair and they laugh. He gets up to go and Rose puts a leg out to trip him up. Mickey picks up the arm and waves with it.**_

**MICKEY: ****Buh Bye!**

**ROSE: ****Bye!**

_**Mickey pretends to strangle himself with the arm and leaves. Rose shakes her head fondly and turns her attention back to the news**_

"Rickey, oh you don't want to do that. Very dangerous. Well it is when activated." Said nine.

"MY NAME IS MICKEY, NOT RICKEY!"

**REPORTER: ****...fire then spread throughout the store... there is very little chance of saving the infrastructure...**

"When you blow things up, you really go for it!" Luke said and Sophie nodded her head in agreement.

_**Outside, Mickey tosses the arm into a bin as he walks past it. Zoom into the darkness of the bin...**__**Shows red alarm clock, which goes off, Rose whacks it and stops it, then sits up.**_

**JACKIE: **_**(in background)**_**There's no point in getting up, sweetheart. You've got no job to go to. **_**Rose flops back on her pillow.**_

_**Rose is having breakfast, her mother is talking to her.**_

**JACKIE: ****There's Finches... you could try them. They've always got jobs.**

**ROSE: ****Oh, great. The butchers.**

A few of the girls shuddered.

**JACKIE: ****Well it might do you good! That shop was giving you airs and graces. And I'm not joking about getting compensation - you've had genuine shock and trauma! Arianna got two thousand quid off the ****council just because the old man behind the desk said she looked Greek! I know she IS Greek, but that's not the point - it's a valid claim.**

"What is it with Jackie and compensation?"

**Rose**_** hears a rattling and stands up.**_

**ROSE: ****Mum, you're such a liar, I told you to nail that cat flap down. We're going to get strays!**

**JACKIE: ****I did it weeks back!**

**ROSE: ****No, you thought about it!**

"OMG HAHA" Jack laughed his head off.

"Sweetie, are you sure I'm not allowed to shoot him. He doesn't die!"

"No River."

_**Rose discovers that the screws have fallen out onto the floor. The cat flap moves violently. Rose leaps backwards, then comes back again and pokes the cat flap open gingerly. The Doctor's face is right outside it. Rose gasps and opens the door**_

"Oh God. He comes back!"

"Hey, what is that supposed to mean? I always come back." Eleven said proudly.

**THE DOCTOR: ****What're you doing here?**

**ROSE: ****I live here.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Well, what do you do that for?**

**ROSE: ****Because I do! And I'm only at home because someone blew up my job.**

_**The Doctor gets out his sonic screwdriver.**_

"Doctor, your screwdriver is different." Rory said to Ten and Eleven.

"WHAT, YOU CHANGED IT?" Ten and Nine yelled at Eleven.

"Had too, the atraxi." He mumbled upset.

"Soon your gonna tell me you changed the inside of the TARDIS."

"Have, twice."

"WHAT?"

"Guys can you please stop getting upset over the inside of the TARDIS and what screwdriver you have." Sarah Jane said. Craig agreed with her.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Must've got the wrong signal. You're not plastic, are you? **_**(knocks on Rose's forehead) **_**No, bonehead. Bye, then!**

_**He makes to go, but Rose pulls him back inside.**_

**ROSE: ****You, inside. Right now.**

_**She shuts the door.**_

**JACKIE: ****Who is it?**

_**Rose pokes her head into Jackie's bedroom.**_

**ROSE: ****It's about last night, he's part of the inquiry. Give us 10 minutes.**

**JACKIE: ****She deserves compensation.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Huh, we're talking millions.**

_**The Doctor leans against the doorframe, waiting for Rose to come back. Jackie looks at him for a moment and stands up, flirtatiously.**_

"God, please say she isn't doing and gonna do what I think she is gonna do," Rose exclaimed to the group.

All the Doctors just nodded their heads and looked disturbed.

**JACKIE: ****I'm in my dressing gown.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes, you are.**

**JACKIE: ****There's a strange man in my bedroom.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes, there is.**

**JACKIE: ****Well, anything could happen.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****No.**

"OH MY GOD! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jack exclaimed whilst everyone except for the doctors and Rose laughed their heads off.

_**The Doctor walks off. Jackie pulls a face at his back.**_

"Well, no wonder she doesn't like you that much!" Rose and Jack said together.

**ROSE: ****Don't mind the mess. Do you want a coffee?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Might as well, thanks! Just milk.**

_**Rose goes into the kitchen and starts making coffee.**_

**ROSE: ****We should go to the police. Seriously. Both of us.**

_**The Doctor picks up a gossip magazine.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****That won't last, he's gay and she's an alien.**

Everyone turned to the doctors they knew best but they all shook their heads at the same time and said

"Not telling you."

**ROSE: ****I'm not blaming you, even if it was just some sort of joke that went wrong.**

_**The Doctor picks up a book and flicks through it.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sad ending.**

"You read that fast?" Rory asked in disbelief. Eleven just raised his eyebrows and smiled.

**ROSE: ****They said on the news they'd found a body.**

_**The Doctor picks up an envelope and reads it.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Rose Tyler. **_**(looks in mirror) **_**Ahh, could've been worse! **_**(pokes his large ears) **_**Look at me' ears.**

"They are pretty big!"

**ROSE: ****All the same, he was nice. Nice bloke.**

_**The Doctor shuffles a pack of cards.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Luck be a lady!**

**ROSE: ****Well anyway if we are going to go to the police, I want to know what I'm saying.**

**__****The Doctor makes all the cards go flying.**

"Your not very good at controlling anything are you? Not the TARDIS or a pack of cards!" Martha said making the Doctors protest.

**ROSE: ****I want you to explain everything.**

**THE DOCTOR:**_**(of the cards) **_**Maybe not. **_**(hears scuffling from behind sofa) **_**What's that then? You got a cat?**

**ROSE: ****No...**

_**The Doctor leans behind the sofa and the dummy's arm leaps out and grabs him by the neck.**_

"Poor Doctor. NOT!" Everyone laughed except the Doctors who just rubbed their necks.

**ROSE: **_**(wandering in with coffee)**_**We did have, but there's these strays, they come in off the estate...**

_**Behind her, the Doctor is being strangled viciously by the hand while he tries vainly to fight it off. She does not quite seem to register that the Doctor is being harassed by a rubber hand.**_

**ROSE: ****I told Mickey to chuck that out...**

"Can't you see he is being strangled by that thing?" Rani and Clyde asked Rose. She just shrugged.

_**She puts the coffee down on the table.**_

**ROSE: ****Honestly, give a man a plastic hand, ********anyway, I don't even know your name, Doctor... what was it?**

**__****The Doctor throws the hand off and it flies across the room attaching itself to Rose's face. She screams and the Doctor leaps up and tries to pull it off. Jackie is drying her hair, completely**_ oblivious._

"Seriously, are your family that ignorant?" Madame Vastra asked.

_**The Doctor and Rose crash onto the coffee table, breaking it, and roll onto the floor. He**__** pushes her back onto the sofa and gets out his sonic screwdriver, disabling the hand.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's alright, I've stopped it. There you go, you see? **_**(tosses it to her)**_**'Armless.**

"Poor, poor jokes."

**ROSE: ****Do you think?**

_**She uses it to whack him on the shoulder.**_

_**THE DOCTOR: ****Ow!**_

"Haha!" Jack laughed. He was starting to get on everyone's nerves and River's hand was itching towards her gun. She wanted to shoot Jack there and then. The only reason she didn't is because she could feel her husbands glare on the back of her head. She knew he would be angry if she shot him.

_**The Doctor is running down the stairs, Rose hot on his tail.**_

**ROSE: ****Hold on a minute, you can't just go swanning off.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes I can. Here I am, this is me, swanning off. See ya!**

**ROSE: ****That arm was moving, it tried to kill me!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Ten out of ten for observation.**

**ROSE: ****You can't just walk away, that's not fair! You've got to tell me what's going on.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****No I don't.**

"You know, I'm surprised I didn't just try and attack you there and then!" Rose laughed. Nine and Ten huffed and Eleven had a pained look on his face.

_**They reach the bottom of the stairs, go through the doors.**_

**ROSE: ****Alright then. I'll go to the police. I'll tell everyone. You said, if I did that, I'd get people killed. So, your choice. Tell me, or I'll start talking.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Is that supposed to sound tough?**

**ROSE: ****Sort of.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Doesn't work.**

"No it doesn't." That was enough to send River over the edge. She grabbed out her blaster and shot him right in the head. A few people shouted. Others just looked on in horror. The few people that knew he couldn't die just smirked. Eleven looked annoyed and went over to Jack. He whispered in his ear:  
"I know you have woken up already. Just get up." Jack obeyed and sat up. The people that thought he was dead just looked amazed and a little bit scared. Eleven just said  
"He can't die."

**ROSE: ****Who are you?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****I told you! The Doctor.**

**ROSE: ****Yeah. But Doctor what?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Just the Doctor.**

**ROSE: ****The Doctor.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Hello!**

**ROSE: ****Is that supposed to sound impressive?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sort of.**

"Doesn't work!" Rose said in a mocking tone.

**ROSE: ****Come on. You can tell me. I've seen enough. Are you the police?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****No. I was just passing through. I'm a long way from home.**

**ROSE: ****But what have I done wrong? How comes those plastic things keep coming after me?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh! Suddenly the entire world revolves around you! You were just an accident, you got in the way, that's all.**

**ROSE: ****It tried to kill me!**

"Well that was your own fault." Strax said and Rose sent him an evil glare.

**THE DOCTOR: ****It was after me, not you! Last night, in the shop, I was there, you blundered it. Almost ruined the whole thing. This morning, I was tracking it down, it was tracking me down... the only reason it fixed on you is that you met me.**

**ROSE: ****So, what you're saying is, the entire world revolves around you.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sort of, yeah.**

"It's true!" Ten and Eleven said at the same time.

**ROSE: ****You're full of it!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sort of, yeah.**

**ROSE: ****But, all this plastic stuff - who else knows about it?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****No one.**

**ROSE: ****What, you're on your own?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Well, who else is there? I mean, you lot, all you do is eat chips, go to bed, and watch telly! When all the time, underneath you, there's a war going on!**

"Chips are good!" Luke said with the most convincing smile in the world. Everyone agreed with him except Nine and Eleven. They just made noises like they were the worst thing in the universe.

_**Rose takes the arm off him.**_

**ROSE: ****Okay, start from the beginning.**

_**They exit the road**_

**ROSE****: If you're gonna go with this living plastic, and I don't even believe that, but if we do... how did you kill it?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****The thing controlling it projects life into the arm. I cut off the signal, dead.**

**ROSE: ****So that's radio control?**

"Not quite Rosie Posie." Jack said and Rose shared a look with River that said the next time he said something to annoy either of them, River had to give her blaster to Rose to shoot him or shoot him herself.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Thought control. ****  
**_**  
There was silence.**_

**THE DOCTOR**_**: **_**Are you alright?**

**ROSE: ****Yeah. So, who's controlling it, then?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Long story.**

**ROSE: ****But what's it all for? I mean, shop window dummies... what's that about? Is someone tr****y****ing to take over Britain's shops?**

"That would be awful. Plastic dummies as managers. Having to go up to them and ask them where the vegetable isle is." Sophie said. She shuddered at the thought.

**__****They laugh.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****No.**

**ROSE: ****I know.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's not a price war. **

"Sounds like the supermarkets battling it out to be the lowest price store!"

**(**_**laugh again - suddenly serious) **_**They want to overthrow the human race and destroy you. Do you believe me?**

**ROSE: ****No.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****But you're still listening.**

_**She stops. The Doctor walks on.**_

**ROSE: ****Really though, Doctor. Tell me - who are you?**

"A timelord," everyone said.

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(stops)**_**Do you know like we were saying? About the Earth revolving?**_**(walks back to her) **_**It's like when you were a kid. The first time they tell you the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it because everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. ****  
**_**(takes her hand) **_**The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning at a thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me. Clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go... **_**(lets go of her hand) **_**That's who I am. Now, forget me, Rose Tyler. **_**(takes the arm, waves it in her face) **_**Go home.**

"How can she just forget you after that?"

_**He walks away. Rose watches his retreating back and then starts to walk herself. The Doctor steps into a police box. Rose hears the sound of the TARDIS departing. She runs back as fast as she can. The police box is gone. She shields her eyes from the sun, looks around her, then walks away again. Outside Mickeys flat, Mickey lets Rose in.**_

**MICKEY: ****Yahey, there's my woman! **_**(slaps her bum)**_**Kit off!**

"Didn't know you had it in ya Mickey Mouse!" Jack laughed as Mickey held his head in his hands, embarrassed.

**ROSE: ****Shut up. **_**(he gives her a kiss) **_**Mwah!**

**MICKEY: ****Coffee?**

**ROSE: ****Yeah, only if you wash the mug. And I don't mean rinse, I mean wash. Can I use your computer?**

"He still doesn't wash the mugs properly. Or let me use his computer unless his emails are locked!" Martha said to Rose. She was starting to like her more and more.

**MICKEY: ****Yeah. Any excuse to get in the bedroom.**

_**Mickey goes into the kitchen. Rose closes the door of his bedroom behind her.**_

**MICKEY: ****Don't read my emails!**

"I rest my case!" Martha laughed with everyone else who had heard her comment earlier.

_**Shows Rose on Mickey's computer.**_

_**Rose turns on the computer and types "Doctor" into a search engine. No relevant results are found. She types in "Doctor Living Plastic". Still nothing. She types "Doctor Blue Box". The first result reads "Doctor Who - do you know this man? Contact Clive here..." She clicks on it and a webpage with a blurry photograph of the Doctor and the words "Have you seen this man? Contact Clive" are presented to her. She clicks "Contact Clive". Mickey and Rose are sitting in the car.**_

**ROSE: ****You're not coming in! He's safe, he's got a wife and kids.**

**MICKEY: ****Yeah but who told you that? He did. That's exactly what an Internet lunatic murderer **_**would**_** say.**

"He is right you know!"

_**Rose gets out of the car anyway, grinning. Mickey doesn't look too happy, and gives a man putting out his rubbish the evils. Rose knocks on the door of a house and it is answered by a boy of about 11.**_

**ROSE: ****Uh, hello, I've come to see Clive? We've been emailing.**

**CLIVE'S SON: ****Dad! It's one of your nutters!**

"Well, that's just rude!"

_**Clive appears.**_

**CLIVE: ****Sorry. Hello. You must be Rose. I'm Clive. Obviously!**

**ROSE: ****I better tell you now - my boyfriend's waiting in the car, just in case you're going to kill me!**

_**They laugh.**_

**CLIVE: ****No, good point. No murders.**

_**He waves to Mickey who nods, still distrustful.**_

**CAROLINE: ****Who is it?**

**CLIVE: ****Oh it's something to do with the Doctor! She's been reading the website. Please come through, I'm in the shed.**

_**Clive's wife, Caroline, comes down the stairs carrying a washing basket.**_

**CAROLINE: ****She? She read a website about the Doctor? She's a she?**

"I thought you only took female companions?" Clara asked Eleven.

"I do. The only exceptions are Mickey, Rory, Jack and Artie." He answered. She nodded her head

_**She smiles ironically and shuts the door. Mickey looks suspicious. Clive is showing Rose around the shed, which is a sort of shrine to the Doctor.**_

"I think he may be slightly obsessed!"

"Well who wouldn't be? A hottie like me!" eleven said. When he mentioned hottie everyone laughed, including River.

"Don't worry. I still think your sexy!" River said. This cheered him up considerably.

**CLIVE: ****A lot of this stuff's quite sensitive, I couldn't just send it to you. People might intercept it, if you know what I mean. If you dig deep enough - keep a lively mind - this Doctor keeps cropping up all over the place. Political diaries, conspiracy theories. Even ghost stories. No first name, no last name. Just ****'The Doctor'. Always The Doctor. And the title seems to have been passed down from father to son, it appears to be an inheritance. That's your Doctor there, isn't it?**

_**He points to a photo of the Doctor on a computer screen behind them.**_

**ROSE: ****Yeah.**

**CLIVE: ****I tracked it down to the Washington public archive last year. The online photo's enhanced, but if we look at the original...**

_**He shows Rose some photographs of the Doctor standing in a crowd at the time and place of the assassination of JFK.**_

**CLIVE: ****November the 22nd, 1963. The assassination of President Kennedy.**

"Some evil slitheen were there trying to stop his death. If that happened the whole future would change!" He said.

**ROSE: ****Must be his father...**

"Nope. Same old me."

**CLIVE: ****Going further back... April 1912. **_**(brings over a photo album)**_**This is a photo of the Daniels family, Southampton. And friend. **_**(points to the Doctor, standing with them) **_**This was taken the day before they were due to sail off for the New World. On the Titanic. And for some unknown reason, they cancelled the trip and survived.**

River coughed and looked at her doctor. He smiled awkwardly and straightened his bowtie. He was so getting told off later.

** A****nd... **_**(shows her a sketch) **_**1883. Another Doctor. And look - the same lineage. He's identical. This one washed up on the coast of Sumatra on the very day Krakatoa exploded. The Doctor is a legend woven throughout history. When disaster comes, he's there. He has a storm in his wake. And he has one constant companion.**

"You amazing human people!" Eleven exclaimed with a beaming smile on his face.

**ROSE: ****Who's that?**

**CLIVE: ****Death.**

His smile faltered and his expression turned stony.

_**Mickey is still waiting outside in his car. He looks around as a bin starts to shuffle its way towards him. Goes back to Clive and Rose.**_

**CLIVE: ****If the Doctor's back... if you've seen him, Rose... then one thing's for certain - we're all in danger.**

_**Mickey looks at the bin again, but it is stationary. A few seconds later, it starts moving again. He gets out of the car and walks to the bin, looking around it to see what is moving it. Seeing nothing, he places both hands on the lid and opens it dramatically.**_

**MICKEY: ****Come on then!**

"Oh, Rickey!"

"MICKEY!"

_**The bin is empty. Shows shed again.**_

**CLIVE: ****If he's singled you out... if the Doctor's making house calls... then God help you. **

_**Mickey shuts the bin, confused. He tries to walk away but his hands are stuck to the bin. When he tries to pull away, the bin stretches and won't let him. Eventually, the bin opens its lid and pulls him in backwards, shutting with a satisfied burp.**_

Some people let out a small gasp. They were really getting into it not realising that Mickey was fine.

**ROSE: ****Who is he? Who do you think he is?**

**CLIVE: ****I think he's the same man. I think he's immortal. I think he's an alien from another world.**

"Close."

_**Rose comes back to the car, talking before she's even got in.**_

**ROSE: ****Alright! He's a nutter! Off his head! COMPLETE online conspiracy freak. You win! Oof.**

"He is not a nutter. He was the closest anyone has got to knowing who I am.

_**She gets into the car. The person sitting at the wheel is obviously not Mickey, but a plastic replica of him. Rose seems not to notice.**_

"Like I said. Ignorant."

**ROSE: ****What're we going to do tonight? I fancy a pizza.**

**MICKEY: ****Pizzaaa! P-p-p-pizza!**

**ROSE:...****or a Chinese...**

**MICKEY: ****Pizza!**

_**They drive off in a wobbly line.**_

"IGNORANT!"

_**R**__**ose and Mickey sit at a table for two in a restaurant.**_

**ROSE: ****Do you think I should try the hospital? Suki said they had a few jobs going in the canteen. That's it then... dishing out chips... I could do A Levels...**

"You are quite good at dishing out chips. the kids gave a very good reference!" Ten joked. She just punched him in the shoulder.

_**'Mickey' stares at her, grinning.**_

**ROSE: ****I dunno. It's all Jimmy Stone's fault. I only left school because of him, and look where he en****d****ed up. What do you think?**

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****So, where did you meet this Doctor?**

**ROSE: ****I'm sorry, wasn't I talking about me for a second?**

"Slightly self-centred aren't we!" Ianto joked. He was taking over from Jack so he wouldn't get shot again.

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****Because, I reckon it started back at the shop, am I right? Is he something to do with that?**

**ROSE: ****No...**

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****Come on.**

**ROSE: ****Sort of.**

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****What was he doing there?**

**ROSE: ****I'm not going on about him, Mickey, I'm not, because, I know it sounds daft but... I don't think he's safe. I think he's dangerous.**

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****But you can trust me sweetheart! **_**(in quick succession) **_**Babe, sugar, darling, sugar.**

"How could you not have realised by now?"

_**Rose looks confused.**_

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****You can tell me anything. Tell me about the Doctor and what he's planning, and I can help you, Rose. Because that's all I really wanna do, sweetheart, babe, sugar, sweetheart.**

**ROSE: ****What're you doing that for?**

_**A Waiter approaches the table.**_

**WAITER: ****Your champagne.**

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****We didn't order any champagne. **_**(grabs Rose's hand) **_**Where's the Doctor? **_**The Waiter has simply moved to the other side of the table and holds the bottle out to Rose.**_

**WAITER: ****Ma'am. Your champagne.**

**ROSE: ****It's not ours... Mickey, what is it? What's wrong?**

**MICKEY: ****I need to find out how much you know, so where is he?**

**WAITER: ****Doesn't anybody want this champagne?**

"That waiter is very persistent isn't he!" Angie said with a smirk on her face. Artie just looked at her because he had no idea who the waiter was.

_**Mickey, exasperated, raises his eyes to the waiter for the first time.**_

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****Look, we didn't order i- **_**(the Waiter is in fact, the Doctor) **_**Ah. Gotcha.**

_**The Doctor shakes the bottle.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Don't mind me. I'm just toasting the happy couple. On the house!**

_**The cork pops out and hits Mickey squarely on the forehead. His forehead absorbs the cork and he spits it out of his mouth. It is finally revealed to Rose that Mickey has in fact been replaced with a plastic replica.**_

"FINALLY SHE REALSISES!"

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****Anyway.**

_**His hands turn into clubs and he smashes the table in. Rose screams and runs out of the way. The Doctor grabs the Auton's head and pulls it off.**_

**PLASTIC MICKEY: ****Don't think that's gonna stop me.**

_**A couple at a nearby table scream, but the Doctor grins. Rose presses the fire bell.**_

"Nice. Not what I would have done but everyone is different." River said to Rose. Rose felt suddenly happy that the doctor's wife is impressed with her.

"What would you have done?" Jack asked in a flirty tone.

"Shot my gun in the air."

"Me too!"

"Jack, four words, MY WIFE. NO FLIRTING!"

"Oh okay. Calm down big man."

**ROSE: ****Everyone out! Out now!**

_**Everyone runs for the exit. The Auton stays inside, blindly smashing tables with his club-hands.**_

**ROSE: ****Get out! Get out! Get out!**

_**Rose and the Doctor run through the kitchen and out of a back exit. With the Auton in hot pursuit. The Doctor locks a metal door with his sonic screwdriver while Rose tries desperately to find an escape out of the yard they are in. She bangs desperately at some locked gates.**_

**ROSE: ****Open the gate! Use that tube thing, come on!**

The doctors looked offended.

**THE DOCTOR: ****What, this? This is a sonic screwdriver.**

**ROSE: ****Use it!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Nah. Tell ya what, let's go in here.**

_**He approaches a police box in the middle of the yard and unlocks it. The Auton is beginning to make dents in the door from the other side. Rose runs to look at it.**_

"Good reaction. Please be a good reaction."

**ROSE: ****We can't hide inside a wooden box! **_**(runs to the gate and rattles the chains)**_**It's gonna get us! Doctor!**

_**She runs into the police box. Rose slams the door behind her, takes a few steps in, looks around, then runs straight back out again. She walks once around the police box and arrives back at the front again. T**__**he Auton finally makes a hole in the door, so she runs back into the police box.**_

"PERFECT!"

**ROSE : ****It's gonna follow us!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****The assembled hoards of Genghis Khan couldn't get through that door, and believe me, they've tried. Now, shut up a minute.**

"Still as rude as ever!"

_**Rose stands trembling near the door of the TARDIS, looking around at how huge it is compared with the outside. The Doctor is wiring up the head of the Auton.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****You see, the arm is too simple, but the head's perfect.**

_**Rose still looks overwhelmed.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I can use it to trace the signal back to the original source. Right.**_**(turns to Rose, gives her his full attention) **_**Where do you want to start?**

**ROSE: ****Um... the inside's bigger than the outside?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes.**

**ROSE: ****It's alien.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yup.**

**ROSE: ****Are you alien?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes. **_**(Rose stares) **_**Is that alright?**

**ROSE: **_**(quickly) **_**Yeah.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's called the TARDIS, this thing. T-A-R-D-I-S, that's Time And Relative Dimension In Space. ****__****(a small sob from Rose)**

She hid her face in John's shoulder a bit embarrassed.

**That's okay. Culture shock. Happens to the best of us.**

**ROSE: ****Did they kill him? Mickey? Did they kill Mickey? Is he dead?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh... didn't think of that.**

"Of course. Forget about me!" Mickey looked slightly annoyed but Martha calmed him down.

**ROSE: ****He's my boyfriend. You pulled off his head - they copied him and you didn't even think? And now you're just going to let him melt?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Melt? **_**(turns around in time to see 'Mickey's' head melting with a bubbling noise)**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh, no no no no no NO!**

"Guessing that's not because you think I just died."

_**He starts running frantically around the console, pressing buttons and pulling levers.**_

**ROSE: ****What're you doing?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Reviving the signal, it's fading! Wait I've got it... **_**(looks at screen) **_**No No No No No No NO! **_**(The TARDIS shakes as the engines move) **_**Almost there! Almost there! Here we go! **_**The engines sto**__**p and the Doctor runs out the **__**TARDIS doors without another word.**_

**ROSE: ****You can't go out there, it's not safe!**

_**She follows him outside.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I lost the signal, I got **_**so**_** close.**

_**Rose hops out of the TARDIS, looking confused again.**_

**ROSE: ****We've moved! Does it fly?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Disappears there, reappears here, you wouldn't understand.**

"Why not Doctor?" Amy asked. Nine just shook his head. He was too busy watching his life. Ten and Eleven did the exact same as Nine.

**ROSE: ****But if we're somewhere else, what about that headless thing? It's still on the loose.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****It melted with the head, are you going to witter on all night?**

**ROSE: ****I'll have to tell his mother...**

_**The Doctor looks at her questioningly.**_

**ROSE: ****Mickey! I'll have to tell his mother he's dead, and you just went and forgot him, again!**

_**The Doctor rolls his eyes, unconcerned.**_

"Really. Am I that much of a pain to you?"

**ROSE: ****You were right, you ARE alien.**

_**She turns to walk away.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Look, if I did forget some kid called Mickey****—**

"I'm not a kid!"

**ROSE: ****Yeah, he's not a kid.**

"Thank you Rose."

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's because I'm trying to save the life of every **_**stupid**_** ape blundering on top of this planet, a****l****right?**

"STUPID APE?" Every human looked at Nine in disbelief.

**ROSE: ****Alright!**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yes! It is!**

_**Rose shakes her head disbelievingly.**_

**ROSE: ****If you are an alien, then how comes you sound like you're from the North?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Lots of planets have a North. **

"He says that an awful lot."

_**He folds his arms indignantly and looks away.**_

**ROSE: ****What's a police public call box?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's a**** telephone box from the 1950s. **_**(pa**__**ts the TARDIS fondly, grinning) **_**It's a disguise.**

_**Rose smiles and shakes her head.**_

**ROSE: ****Okay. And this living plastic, what's it got against us?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Nothing, it loves you. You've got such a good planet. Lots of smoke and oil, plenty of toxins and dioxins in the air... perfect. Just what the Nestene Consciousness needs. It's food stock was destroyed in the war, all its protein plants rotted, so Earth... dinner!**

"So we are food now? Great!"

**ROSE: ****Any way of stopping it?**

_**Grinning, the Doctor produces a tube of blue liquid from his jacket.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Anti-plastic!**

"Oh, I hate anti-plastic."

**ROSE: ****Anti-plastic...**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Anti-plastic! But first I've got to find it. How can you hide something that big in a city this small?**

**ROSE: ****Hold on... hide what?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****The transmitter. The Consciousness is controlling every single piece of plastic so it needs a transmitter to boost the signal.**

**ROSE: ****What's it look like?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Like a transmitter. Round and massive, slap bang in the middle of London.**

_**He paces around, agitated, looking around for a clue.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****A huge circular metal structure... like a dish...**

_**He stands facing Rose, his back to the railings of the bridge. Behind him, the London Eye looms 450 foot above them, but he doesn't seem to register.**_

"Your just as oblivious as her!"

**THE DOCTOR:****...like a wheel. Close to where we're standing. Must be COMPLETELY invisible.**

_**Rose considers the Eye behind him.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****What?**

_**Rose nods towards the Eye. The Doctor turns around, then back to her, completely clueless.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****What?**

Everyone laughed and the doctors just huffed.

_**Rose shakes her head, looking at the Eye still. He turns around but still fails to make the co**__**n**__**nection.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****What is it? What?**

_**Rose simply carries on staring at it. The Doctor turns around again and finally, it clicks.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh... fantastic!**

"Finally."

_**He grins madly and runs off. Hand in hand, the Doctor and Rose run across London Bridge towards the Eye. They come to a halt at the foot of the Eye.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Think of it. Plastic, all over the world. Every artificial thing waiting to come alive. The shop window dummies, the phones, the wires, the cables...**

**ROSE: ****The breast implants**

"Seriously. Rose Tyler when I say plastic that is what you think about?" Eleven asked.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Still, we've found the transmitter. The Consciousnes****s must be somewhere underneath.**

_**Rose runs off and finds the entrance to a manhole at the foot of the wall she is looking over.**_

**R****OSE: ****What about down here?**

_**The Doctor runs to join her.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Looks good to me.**

_**They run down the stairs to the manhole. The Doctor takes the lid off it, and red light and smoke pours out. They both climb down the ladder underground. The Doctor opens the door to another chamber and they go down some steps. The Doctor points to a huge, orange, wobbling mass in the middle of the chamber.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****The Nestene Consciousness, that's it, inside the vat. A living, plastic creature.**

**ROSE: ****Well, then. Tip in your anti-plastic and let's go.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****I'm not here to kill it. I've got to give it a chance.**

"The amount of times he gives people chances and that completely fails."

_**They go down some more steps. The Doctor leans over the railings and addresses the Consciousness.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I seek audience with the Nestene Consciousness under peaceful contract. According to co****n****vention 15 of the Shadow Proclamation. **_**The Consciousness flobbles around a bit.**_

"Ugh. That's disgusting."

**THE DOCTOR: ****Thank you. That I might have permission to approach.**

_**Meanwhile, as Rose paces around in the background, she spots Mickey and runs to him. The Doctor rolls his eyes.**_

"What have I ever done wrong?"

"Been born!"

"Doctor. That's my husband!" Martha glared at him and he shut right up.

**ROSE: ****Oh, my God! Mickey! It's okay! It's alright!**

_**She squats down next to him.**_

**MICKEY: ****That thing down there, the liquid, Rose - it can talk**

"Never!" Nine said sarcastically.

**ROSE: ****You're stinking! Doctor, they kept him alive! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yeah, that was always a possibility. Keep him alive to maintain the copy. **

**ROSE: ****You knew that and you never said? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Can we keep the domestics outside, thank you? **

"Why do you hate all the men except from Jack?" Rory asked Eleven.

_**Rose helps Mickey to his feet. The Doctor approaches the Consciousness.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Am I addressing the Consciousness? Thank you. If I might observe, you infiltrated this civilization by means of warped, shunt technology. So, may I suggest, with the greatest respect, that you shunt off?**

_**The plastic globbers in what appears to be a negative manner.**_

"What the hell!"

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh don't give me that, it's an invasion! Plain and simple! Don't talk about constitutional rights!**

_**The plastic rears what would appear to be its head angrily.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I - am - talking! ****This planet is just starting. These stupid little people have only just learnt how to walk, but they're capable of so much more. I'm asking you on their behalf - please, just go.**

"Stupid little people?" They all looked at a doctor. The doctors just gulped loudly.

_**Two Autons approach the Doctor from behind.**_

**ROSE: ****Doctor!**

"He really does know how to annoy people."

_**The Autons grab him. One of them takes the anti-plastic out of his jacket pocket.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****That was just insurance! I wasn't going to USE it.**

"SURE!" Jack said sarcastically. Ten shot him a glare and he shut up.

_**The plastic globbers angrily.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I was not attacking you. I'm here to help. I'm not your enemy. I swear, I'm not... what do you mean?**

_**Doors above him open to reveal the TARDIS.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh, oh no - honestly, no! Yes, that's my ship.**

_**The plastic roars.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****That's not true. I should know, I was there. I fought in the war - it wasn't my fault! I couldn't save your world! I couldn't save any of them!**

"I tried. I really tried." Eleven said looking a little depressed. River cheered him up by whispering something in his ear.

**ROSE: ****What's it doing? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's the TARDIS! The Nestene has identified its superior technology - it's terrified! It's going to the final base. It's starting the invasion! Get out, Rose! Just leg it! Now! **

"She ignored me just like everyone does." Ten said staring pointedly at all his companions (including Wilf, Amy, Rory and Clara).

_**Rose dials a number on her mobile. **_

**ROSE: ****Mum? **

_**Jackie is going down the steps of a police station. **_

**JACKIE: ****Oh, there you are, I was just gonna phone. You **_**can**_** get compensation. I said so. I've got this document thing off the police - don't thank me!**

**ROSE: ****Where are you, mum?**

**JACKIE: ****I'm in town!**

**ROSE: ****Go home! Just go home, right now!**

**JACKIE: ****Darling, you're breaking up, look, I'm just going to do a bit of late night shopping. I'll see you later. Tara!**

"She doesn't listen either!"

_**She hangs up.**_

**ROSE: ****Mum? Mum!**

_**Jackie heads into the Queens Arcade shopping centre.**__**The Consciousness sends out a signal.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's the activation signal! It's transmitting!**

_**The electric blue signal shoots around the Eye.**_

**ROSE: ****The end of the world.**

"A bit over dramatic, don't you think?"

"Shut up Jack"

**__****The activation signal transmits from the London Eye. Clive is in the shopping centre, talking to his wife.**

**CLIVE: ****There's no point creating a spreadsheet if you're going to spend summer money in winter months.**

_**Caroline gasps as she walks past a shop window and the dummy taps the glass.**_

**CAROLINE: ****Oh my God! I thought they were dummies! I nearly had a heart-attack!**

**"They are dummies!" Gwen said.**

"I remember this. Me and granddad were out shopping for clothes for the party we were going to the next day." Donna said.

_**They look around and all the dummies are doing the same. Clive's wife smiles appreciatively... until they punch their way through the glass and step out of the windows. Jackie is coming down an escalator and looks in disbelief at the dummies walking around.**_

**CLIVE: ****It's true. Everything I read, all the stories! It's all true!**

_**A dummy turns towards him. Its hand comes off and reveals a gun, which shoots him. Clive's wife and son scream.**_

"NO! CLIVE WAS A NICE GUY!" Jack and Rose shouted at the same time.

_**The Doctor is still being held hostage.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Get out, Rose! Just get out! Run!**

"Still won't listen!"

_**Part of the ceiling falls in.**_

**ROSE: ****The stairs have gone!**

_**Rose and Mickey try desperately to get into the TARDIS.**_

**ROSE: ****I haven't got the key!**

**MICKEY: ****We're gonna die!**

"Not really. Your still alive now" Craig said to him.

"Yeah well I thought I was gonna die then." Mickey answered.

_**The shopping centre is in chaos. Jackie stands at the bottom of the escalator looking co**__**n**__**fused for a few seconds, then screams and runs, dropping her shopping bag.**_

_**Mickey and Rose are still cowering at the door of the TARDIS. Outside, Jackie finds that there is just as much chaos outside the shopping centre as there is inside. An army of dummies come out of the doors. Jackie runs down the road and ducks b**__**e**__**hind a car outside a wedding shop. The dummies in the window punch through the glass. Jackie screams. Rose watches the Doctor struggle to get to the anti-plastic, then seems to reach some kind of decision. She stands up.**_

**MICKEY: ****Just leave him!**

"Thanks Rickey!"

"MICKEY!"

**__****The wedding dummies advance dangerously on Jackie. All three hold their arms out ready to shoot.**

"God, she didn't tell me about this. She went on about the plastic dummies coming to life but she never said she almost got shot!" Rose said worriedly.

_**Rose takes action.**_

**MICKEY: ****There's nothing you can do!**

_**Rose picks up an axe.**_

**ROSE: ****I've got no A Levels.**

_**The dummies raise their guns at Jackie.**_

**ROSE: ****No job...**

_**The hands open to reveal the space where the bullets can be released.**_

**ROSE: ****No future.**

_**Jackie cowers. Rose hacks at a chain on the wall, trying to release it.**_

**ROSE: ****But I tell you what I have got. Jericho Street Junior School under 7s gymnastic team.**

_**The chain comes loose and Rose grabs onto it.**_

**ROSE: ****I got the bronze!**

"Yay! Rosie Posie got a bronze!"

"I said shut up Jack before you regret it!"

_**Rose swings across the gap over the Consciousness. She kicks the Autons holding the Doctor hostage into the Nestene, anti-plastic and all. The Consciousness starts to writhe and scream. Rose lands safely in the Doctor's arms at the other side of the gap.**_

Everyone cheered and clapped until Eleven reminded them that it wasn't over yet.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Now we're in trouble.**

_**The Consciousness starts to explode as Rose and the Doctor run off. The signal from the Eye is cut off. The Autons in the high street that were previously attacking people, stop, and start to twitch as if they are doing some kind of dance. Jackie uncovers her eyes warily. Rose, the Doctor and Mickey all manage to reach the TARDIS. Rose grins at the Consciousness before she goes in and closes the door, as it starts to die. Just before the whole chamber goes up in flames, the TARDIS disappears. The dummies all fall to the ground, twitching at first, but dead. Mickey runs backwards out of the TARDIS and falls over, looking terrified. He backs against a wall.**_

"BEST REACTION EVER!"

_**Rose, however, steps out and rings her mother on her mobile.**_

**JACKIE: **_**(answers phone)**_**Rose! Rose! Don't go out of the house, it's not safe!**

_**Rose laughs in relief to hear Jackie's voice.**_

**JACKIE: ****There were all of these things! And they were shooting! And they****—**

_**Satisfied that Jackie is alive, Rose hangs up on her, smiling to herself.**_

"Just as rude as Nine" Strax said. He was finding it hard to not suggest they blow up everything.

**JACKIE: ****Hello? Hello?**

_**Rose runs over to Mickey.**_

**ROSE: ****A fat lot of good you were!**

A few people laughed.

_**Mickey whimpers. The Doctor stands in the doorway of the TARDIS.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Nestene Consciousness? **_**(clicks fingers) **_**Easy.**

**ROSE: **_**(teasingly)**_**You were useless in there. You'd be dead if it wasn't for me. **

"True!"

**THE DOCTOR: Yes I would. Thank you. Right then! I'll be off! Unless, uh... I don't know... you could come with me.**

_**Rose looks at him and puts her hands in her pockets.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****This box isn't just a London hopper, you know, it goes anywhere in the un****i****verse free of charge.**

**MICKEY: ****Don't! He's an alien! He's a thing!**

"That was really offensive!" The doctors said at the same time. Everyone else were just laughing their heads off.

**THE DOCTOR: ****He's NOT invited. What do you think? You could stay here and fill your life with work and food and sleep, or you could go, uh... anywhere.**

**ROSE: ****Is it always this dangerous?**

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(nods)**_**Yeah.**

_**Mickey puts his arms around Rose's legs like a little child.**_

People laughed harder and harder at Mickey. He just hid his face in his hands, embarrassed. Martha cheered him up.

**ROSE: ****Yeah, I can't... I've um... gotta go and find my mum and um... someone's gotta look after this stupid lump... **_**(small laugh, pats Mickey on the back)**_**So...**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Okay. See you around.**

_**Rose looks at him intensely, as if she still hasn't really made up her mind. The Doctor does not take his eyes off her, but closes the door. Rose looks at the closed door. The engines of the TARDIS rev up, and it slowly disappears. Rose stares at the space where it was, lost in thought.**_

**ROSE: ****Come on, let's go.**

_**Mickey is in absolute shock, staring at the empty space where the TARDIS stood.**_

Everyone except for Mickey were laughing so hard it hurt their chests.

**ROSE: ****C'mon... come on...**

_**She helps him to his feet and they begin to walk away. However, the sound of the engines is heard again. Rose and Mickey spin around. The TARDIS reappears. The Doctor pops his head out.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****By the way - did I mention, it also travels in time?**

"Works all the time!"

_**He grins and goes back in - leaving the door ajar. Rose turns to Mickey.**_

**ROSE: ****Thanks.**

**MICKEY: ****Thanks for what?**

"Yeah you never told me what for."

"Never mind."

**ROSE: ****Exactly.**

_**She kisses his cheek and runs into the TARDIS **__**with a broad smile on her face.**_

_**Episode ends**_

"That was so exciting!" Jack squealed like a little girl.

"Yeah it is pretty cool finding out what the doctor did before us and after." Rory added.

Everyone started to talk about the episode as the next one started to come on.

**DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW**

So what do you think? Leave a review and the next chapter will be up soon.


	3. Chapter 3: The End of The World

Here is the second chapter. Sorry for the long wait for this chapter. I've had loads of school work to do but now we have broken up for the holidays I can update more regularly. Hope you like it. Leave a review please.

Big thanks to WaterlooRoad01 for reminding me that Jackie is there and she would have seen that episode. I forgot she was there because there were so many people to remember to put. From now on though I will try and put everyone in. Sorry if I haven't included your favourite characters enough. PM me or leave a review and I will try and put them in more.

For a brilliant story read **Watching Doctor Who Series 6 Part 1 **by **Nikki Pond**. Eleven and some of his friends are stuck in Nikki's living room and are watching the doctors life from series 6 part 1. Amazing story, read and review it! Don't review negatively because it can be quite upsetting. If you don't think it is good just don't review.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who**

** Review Responses:**

Twelve13: No River is gonna stay conscious for the episode because she has already done Trensalore.

Katiex11: I am gonna make sure Jack is killed again. You have my word. Just not in this chapter.

Thanks to everyone for all the positive feedback.

**DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW DWDW**

**Rose has just run into the TARDIS from the last episode.**

**THE DOCTOR: Right then, Rose Tyler - you tell me, where do you want to go? Backwards or forwards in time. It's your choice. What's it going to be?**

"Forwards!" Most people said, a few people said

"Back!" and Jackie said

"Nowhere." Rose gave her a disapproving look when she said this.

**ROSE: Forwards. **

_**The Doctor presses a few buttons. **_

**THE DOCTOR: How far? **

**ROSE: **_**(picking random number) **_**One hundred years.**

"BORING!"

_**He pulls a lever and turns a knob. The engines lurch and then stop after a few seconds. **_

**THE DOCTOR: There you go, step outside those doors, it's the twenty-second century. **

**ROSE: You're kidding. **

"I don't think he is Rosie Posie!" Jack said to an annoyed Rose.

"Well he may have got the date wrong as usual!" Amy said to Jack with a smug look on her face because he couldn't say she was wrong because she was right. Rose gave a her smile, thanking her helping the her. Eleven just looked annoyed because no-one thought he could drive the TARDIS.

**THE DOCTOR: That's a bit boring though, do you want to go further? **

**ROSE: Fine by me! **

_**The Doctor starts up the engines again. When they stop, he looks at her. **_

**THE DOCTOR: Ten thousand years in the future. Step outside, it's the year 12005, the New Roman Empire.**

**ROSE: **_**(teasingly) **_**You think you're so impressive.**

"He is exactly the same now!"

**THE DOCTOR: I AM so impressive!**

**ROSE: You wish!**

"I don't wish for it to be true because it is true!" Eleven exclaimed in a cocky tone.

"Not true!"

**THE DOCTOR: Right then, you asked for it. I know exactly where to go. **_**(revs up the engine, pumps a lever furiously) **_**Hold on! **

_**The TARDIS hurtles through the time vortex. With a pinging noise, the TARDIS stops. **_

**ROSE: Where are we? **

"Somewhere in the future! Duh!" Jack said in a sarcastic tone.

"I mean it Jack, if you don't shut up I will kill you!" Rose said, glaring at Jack.

"I swear, she is almost as scary as Amy!" Rory muttered to Eleven.

"What was that Rory?" Amy asked with a menacing look on her face.

"Nothing dear!" A innocent Rory said to Amy. She happy with his answer and cuddled up closer to him.

_**The Doctor gestures towards the doors. Rose smiles excitedly. **_

**ROSE: What's out there? **

_**The Doctor gestures again. Rose steps outside the doors. Rose finds herself in some kind of wooden room. The Doctor follows her and with his sonic screwdriver, opens the shutters of an enormous window. They go down the stairs and find themselves looking down on the planet Earth. **_

"What a beautiful view!" Jackie and Gwen said. A few nodded in agreement.

**THE DOCTOR: You lot. You spend all your time thinking about dying. Like you're going to get killed by eggs or beef or global warming or asteroids. But you never take time to imagine the impossible. Maybe you survive. This is the year5.5/apple/26.**

"That's even a year?"

"Yep." Eleven answered popping the 'p'.

** Five billion years in your future. This is the day... hold on... (looks at his watch)This is the day the sun expands. Welcome to the end of the world.**

"You took her to see that?"

"Yep." Nine answered popping his 'p' like Eleven.

_**Two space shuttles zoom towards Platform One, essentially a huge space station. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: Shuttles 5 and 6 now docking. Guests are reminded that platform 1 forbids the use of weapons, teleportation and religion. Earth Death is scheduled for 15:39, followed by drinks in the Manchester Suite. **

_**Rose and the Doctor are walking down a corridor. **_

**ROSE: So, when it says 'guests' does that mean people? **

**THE DOCTOR: Depends what you mean by people. **

**ROSE: I mean people. What do you mean? **

**THE DOCTOR: Aliens. **

"God, the first encounter is always scary!" Sarah Jane said to Rose with a sympathetic smile.

**ROSE: What are they doing on board this spaceship? What's it all for? **

_**The Doctor starts to open a door with his sonic screwdriver.**_

**THE DOCTOR: It's not really a spaceship. More like an observation deck. The great and the good are gathering to watch the planet burn. **

**ROSE: What for? **

**THE DOCTOR: Fun.**

"Why would the great and good gather to watch a planet burn?" Amy asked Eleven, confused.

"Just watch." Ten answered for him.

_**They enter a large observation gallery. **_

**THE DOCTOR: Mind you, when I said the great and the good, what I mean is, the rich. **

"Ahh." Amy said, nodding her head in understanding.

**ROSE: But, hold on, they did this once on 'Newsround Extra' - the sun expanding - that takes hundreds of years. **

**THE DOCTOR: Millions. But the planet's now property of the National Trust. They've been keeping it preserved. See down there? **_**(points out of the window at tiny glints of light orbiting the Earth) **_**Gravity satellite. That's holding back the sun. **

**ROSE: **_**(peering out of the window at Earth)**_**The planet looks the same as ever. I thought the continents shifted and things. **

**THE DOCTOR: They did. And the trust shifted them back. That's a classic Earth. But now the money's run out, nature takes over!**

**ROSE: How long has it got?**

_**The Doctor looks at his watch. **_

**THE DOCTOR: About half an hour. And the planet gets roasted.**

"That's nice!" Mickey said in a sarcastic tone.

**ROSE: Is that why we're here? I mean, is that what you do? Jump in at the last minute and save the Earth? **

**THE DOCTOR: I'm not saving it. Time's up. **

**ROSE: But what about the people? **

**THE DOCTOR: It's empty! They're all gone. All left. **

"Where?" Jenny asked.

"To the skies in great big spaceships driven by star whales." Amy answered to a confused Jenny. She looked even more confused when Amy mentioned Star Whales.

"Big alien whales." Nine told her.

_**Rose looks back to the window, realization spreading across her face. **_

**ROSE: Just me then. **

_**The Steward hurries towards them. **_

**STEWARD: Who the hell are you? **

"Oh, well that's nice!" Craig said sarcastically. Everyone agreed with him.

**THE DOCTOR: Oh! That's nice, thanks.**

**STEWARD: But how did you get in? This is a maximum hospitality zone. The guests have disembarked! They're on their way any second now! **

**THE DOCTOR: That's me, I'm a guest, look! I've got an invitation! **_**(flashes a small leather wallet at the Steward) **_**Look, there you see? It's fine, see? The Doctor plus one. I'm the Doctor, this is Rose Tyler. She's my plus one. That all right?**

**STEWARD: Well... obviously. **_**(Doctor grins) **_**Apologies, et cetera. If you're on-board, we'd better start. Enjoy.**

"Now he bows down at your feet and does everything you ask!" Ianto said and Gwen nodded her head.

_**The Doctor nods at him. After the steward walks off, the Doctor shows Rose the card he had flashed at the steward. It is completely blank. **_

**THE DOCTOR: The paper's slightly psychic. Shows them whatever I want them to see. Saves a lot of time.**

"Hey Rose do you remember that time when we were in London and we used psychic paper and it went wrong!"

"Yeah Jack, never could forget it could I? You work out and your single. Haha!"

**ROSE: He's blue.**

"He's blue!" Jackie repeated and a few people laughed at her first sighting of an alien.

**THE DOCTOR: Yeah. **

**ROSE: Okay... **

"The human girl is a bit creeped out by alien species." Strax told everyone as if they couldn't see it.

_**The steward is now speaking through a microphone at the other end of the suite. **_

**STEWARD: We have in attendance, the Doctor and Rose Tyler. Thank you! All staff to their positions. **

_**He claps his hands and a lot of little blue people (the staff) start scurrying around. **_

**STEWARD: Hurry now! Thank you, as quick as we can! Come along, come along! And now, might I introduce the next honoured guest, representing the forest of Cheem, we have Trees. Namely, Jabe, Lute and Coffa. **

"Trees?" Martha said and Ten gave her a quick nod as to confirm it.

_**Jabe, Lute and Coffa walk through the doors.**_

**STEWARD: There will be an exchange of gifts representing peace. If you can keep the room circulating, thank-you. Next, from the solicitors Jolco and Jolco, the Moxx of Balhoon. **

_**The Doctor smiles cheerily, as Rose looks on bewildered**_.

"Poor Rose." Amy said in understanding.

**STEWARD: And next, from Financial Family Seven, we have the Adherents of the Repeated Meme. **

_**The Doctor chuckles at the look on Rose's face. **_

"Hey that's rude!" Donna and Craig said at the same time.

**STEWARD: The inventors of hyposlip travel systems, the brothers Hop Pyleen. Thank you! **

_**Enter new aliens. **_

**STEWARD: Cal 'Spark Plug'. **

_**Enter new aliens. **_

**STEWARD: Mr. and Mrs Pakoo. **

_**Enter new aliens. **_

**STEWARD: The Ambassadors from the City State of Binding Light. **

_**Jabe approaches the Doctor. Either side of her, her companions are holding plant trays with little shoots in them. **_

**JABE: The Gift of Peace. **_**(takes a cutting, hands it to the Doctor) **_**I bring you a cutting of my Grandfather. **

**THE DOCTOR: Thank you! **_**(gives it to Rose) **_**Yes, gifts... erm... **

"God, what is he gonna give her?" River asked with a look of mock disgust.

_**He clears his throat and starts feeling his jacket for something, finding nothing, he says-**_

**THE DOCTOR: I give you in return, air from my lungs. **

_**He blows gently onto Jabe's face, who closes her eyes briefly. **_

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jack laughed his head off.

**JABE: How... intimate**

**THE DOCTOR: (flirtatiously)There's more where that came from. **

"Oh god, his flirting is awful! So glad he got better!"

"River!" Eleven said with a slightly annoyed face. He just gave Jack a weapon for annoying him. It was a good job Jack was immortal or he wouldn't last 2 minutes. Luckily for Eleven, Jack didn't hear her.

**JABE**_**: **_**I bet there is... **

_**Rose has the sort of look on her face that is to be expected of someone who has just witnessed their companion flirting with a tree. **_

"Well you will look like that when your friend is flirting, very badly might I add, with a tree!"

"Hey my flirting is not that bad Rose Tyler!" Nine whined.

**STEWARD: Sponsor of the main event, please welcome the Face of Bo. **

Jack's eyes lit up at the mention of the Face of Bo. He rubbed his hands together and moved forward towards the edge of the sofa. The people who didn't know he was the Face of Bo looked on curiously.

**_A huge head in an equally huge jar is wheeled through the doors._**

"WHAT?!" Jack yelled before fainting. Most people looked alarmed when he fainted and slightly confused and concerned. The rest just looked amused. Some people tried to wake him up until Eleven started to laugh his head off. He explained to the confused faces

"Jack's in love the Face of Bo. At this moment in time and space he doesn't look like that, I can assure you. It's just a surprise for him." A few people laughed at this and Ianto just looked hurt that Jack loved someone else. Jack suddenly woke up, sat back down and focused on getting used to the idea that he was just a head. Ianto just ignored him slightly.

_**The Moxx of Balhoon approaches the Doctor and Rose. **_

**THE DOCTOR: The Moxx of Balhoon. **

**MOXX OF BALHOON: My felicitations on this historical happenstance. I give you the gift of bodily saliva. **

_**He spits accurately into Rose's left eye. **_

"Eugh!" All the girls screamed and a few of the men shuddered.

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(laughs)**_**Thank you very much. **

"Don't laugh that was disgusting!" Clyde, Rani and Luke said at the same time. Jackie was being unusually quiet for once as she was so into the episode because she got to find out what her daughter was doing during the year she disappeared.

_**Rose rubs the spit out of her eye. Next, the Adherents of the Repeated Meme approach them.**_

**THE DOCTOR: Ah! The Adherents of the Repeated Meme. I bring you air from my lungs. **

"I really do hope you have good breath Doctor!" Amy said to Eleven.

_**He breathes heavily over them all. **_

**ADHERENT: A gift of peace in all good faith. **

_**He holds out a large silver egg, which the Doctor takes, throws up into the air, catches, and hands to Rose.**_

"Aren't you gonna carry anything?"

"No."

**STEWARD: And last but not least, our very special guest. Ladies and Gentlemen, and Trees and Multiforms. Consider the Earth below. In memory of this dying world, we call forth The Last Human.**

**_The Doctor looks at Rose to see her reaction. The sliding doors open and what looks like a vertical trampoline made of human skin is wheeled through. It has eyes and a mouth, and wears lipstick._**

"HUMAN?" Every human screeched except for Rose.

"Just wait and see." She told them**_._**

**STEWARD: The Lady Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen.**

**CASSANDRA: Oh, now, don't stare. I know, I know it's shocking, isn't it? I've had my chin completely taken away and look at the difference! Look how thin I am.**

"That's an under statement!" Jack muttered.

_**The Doctor laughs silently but heartily and looks at Rose, who looks shocked. **_

**CASSANDRA: Thin and dainty! I don't look a day over two thousand. Moisturise me, moisturise me.**

"Bit rude, isn't she."

"You haven't seen the half of it!" Rose replied to Madame Vastra.

_**One of the two men in white body suits who wheeled her in is holding a canister, which he sprays onto Cassandra. **_

**CASSANDRA: Truly, I am The Last Human.**

"You call that human?"

"Ssh Jack, I'm trying to watch!" Amy told him. He was suddenly quiet because from what Rory told him, she is very scary.

_**Rose creeps closer for a better look. **_

**CASSANDRA: My father was a Texan. My mother was from the Arctic Desert. They were born on the Earth and were the last to be buried in the soil. **

_**Rose has been walking around to the other side of Cassandra, to get a good view of her from all angles. She is completely flat. **_

**CASSANDRA: I have come to honour them and... **_**(sniffs)...**_**say goodbye. Oh, no tears. **_**(bodyguard wipes her eyes) **_**No tears. I'm sorry.**

"A bit melodramatic, don't you think!"

** But behold! I bring gifts. From Earth itself - the last remaining ostrich egg. **

_**One of the staff comes in and displays the egg to the room. **_

**CASSANDRA: Legend says it had a wingspan of 50 feet and blew fire from its nostrils.**

"What?" The Maitland kids asked.

_**Rose looks mildly confused. **_

**CASSANDRA: Or was that my third husband?**

_**Rose rolls her eyes but the Doctor laughs. **_

"Honestly Doctor, your sense of humour back then was awful!" Jenny laughed.

**CASSANDRA: Who knows! Oh don't laugh. I'll get laughter lines! **

_**She laughs and mumbles to herself for a few seconds. Behind her, a large jukebox is wheeled into the room. **_

**CASSANDRA: And here, another rarity. According to the archives, this was called an iPod. **

"That's an iPod in the future! Can I get one please Doctor" Artie pleaded.

"I'll think about it."

**It stores classical music from humanity's greatest composers. **

_**Rose looks amazed. **_

**CASSANDRA: Play on! **

_**One of the staff presses a button and a record falls into place. The 'iPod' starts playing Tainted Love by Soft Cell. The Doctor bops around happily. **_

"Oh my god. You could never dance could you?" Amy managed to say through her laughter. Everyone laughed along except from the Doctors.

"Hey! I'll have you know I can dance amazingly!" Eleven moaned

"You think the dance you did at our wedding was amazing?" Rory asked genuinely curious.

"Yes it was Rory the Roman!"

**STEWARD: Refreshments will now be served. Earth Death in 30 minutes. **

_**Rose has a lost, overwhelmed expression on her face. Everywhere she looks there are aliens, but no other humans. She rushes from the gallery. **_

"Poor Rosie Posie can't handle a few little aliens!" A gun was thrown from River to Rose and then Jack was on the floor dead. Eleven and Ten huffed as Jack got up and sat back down. They were really getting annoyed at Jack and the fact people kept shooting him.

_**Concerned, the Doctor starts to follow her, but is stopped by Jabe.**_

**JABE: ****Doctor? **_**(she snaps a photo of him when he pauses) **_**Thank you. **

_**The Doctor proceeds on. Jabe walks in the opposite direction. The Adherents of the Repeated Meme are offering the Steward a silver egg. **_

**ADHERENT: ****A gift of peace in all good faith. **

**STEWARD: ****No, you're very kind, but I'm just the Steward. **

_**The Adherents of the Repeated Meme holds the egg out more persistently. **_

**ADHERENT: ****A gift of peace in all good faith.**

**STEWARD: ****Oh, yes. Thank you. Of course. **

"Okay, so that makes me have a feeling that something bad is in one of those eggs!" Sophie told everyone and they nodded along.

_**He takes the egg. Meanwhile, Jabe is trying to get her computer to identify the Doctor's species. **_

**JABE: ****Identify species. Please identify species. **

"A shock is coming for her!" Martha said.

_**The computer makes a small whistling noise. **_

**JABE: ****Now, stop it. Identify his race. Where's he from? **_**(after a moment, stares at the computer in disbelief - hushed) **_**It's impossible. **

"Not really as there are three of me here." Nine said pointing to himself and the two future versions of him.

**__****In a nearby glass cabinet, a metal robotic spider climbs out of one of the metal eggs that the Adherents of the Repeated Meme had been handing out. **

"See, I was right!" Sophie said excitedly, punching the air. A few people laughed.

_**Rose, in another part of the ship, looks out of a window at the raging sun. She jumps when another one of the staff comes into the room, this one female. **_

**ROSE: ****Sorry, am I allowed to be in here? **

_**The employee looks around uneasily. **_

**RAFFALO: ****You have to give us permission to talk. **

"What?" Donna and Amy asked in disbelief. Eleven and Ten nodded their head.

_**She looks at Rose expectantly. Rose looks unsure. **_

**ROSE: ****Uh... you... have permission...?**

**RAFFALO: ****Thank you! And, no. You're not in the way. Guests are allowed anywhere. **

**ROSE: ****'Kay. **

_**Raffalo goes to a panel in the wall and enters a code. Rose watches her. **_

**ROSE: ****What's your name?**

**RAFFALO: ****Raffalo.**

**ROSE: ****Raffalo? **

**RAFFALO: ****Yes, Miss. I won't be long, I've just got to carry out some maintenance.**

_**She kneels before an air vent. **_

**RAFFALO: ****There's a tiny little glitch in the Face of Bo suite. There must be something blocking the system - he's not getting any hot water.**

Jack gulped audibly and turned slightly pale.

**ROSE: ****So, you're a plumber? **

**RAFFALO: ****That's right, Miss. **

**ROSE: ****They still have plumbers? **

**RAFFALO: ****I hope so! Else I'm out of a job! **

_**Rose laughs. **_

**ROSE: ****Where are you from?**

**RAFFALO: ****Crespallion. **

**ROSE: That's a planet, is it?**

"No, Crespallion's part of the Jaggit Brocade, affiliated to the Scarlet Junction, Convex 56." Jack and River said at the same time. They looked at each other and laughed a little.

**RAFFALO: ****No, Crespallion's part of the Jaggit Brocade, affiliated to the Scarlet Junction, Convex 56.**

Jack and River laughed even harder when she said the exact same thing they had said.

** And where are you from, Miss? **_**(seems to remember herself) **_**If you don't mind me asking. **

**ROSE: ****No! Not at all. Erm... I dunno, a long way away... I just sort of, hitched a lift with this man. **_**(only just realising the risk she's taken herself) **_**I didn't even think about it... I don't even know who he is... he's a complete stranger...**

"Oh, thanks!" Eleven, Ten and Nine said at the same time and looked offended.

"It was true though!" Rose defended herself.

_**Raffalo looks slightly worried. Rose snaps herself out of it. **_

**ROSE: ****Anyway, don't let me keep you. Good luck with it! **

_**She begins to walk away. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Thank you, Miss. And- **_**(Rose turns) **_**Thank you for the permission. Not many people are that considerate.**

"Seriously?" A few people shocked, the rest looked disgusted except from the Doctors and Rose. Ten and Nine nodded their heads as if to confirm it.

**ROSE: **_**(smiles) **_**'Kay. See you later. **

_**Raffalo nods and smiles. When Rose has gone, she takes the cover off the air vent. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Now then. **

_**She peers into the vent and then speaks into a small microphone attached to her collar. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Control - I'm at Junction 19 and I think the problem's coming from in here. I'll go inside and have a look. **_**(Hears small tapping) **_**What's that? Is there something in there? **

_**The metal spider we saw breaking out of the egg earlier appears at the end of the shaft.**_

"Oh no. Not Raffalo! I liked her!" Rory said and loads of people agreed with him.

**RAFFALO: ****Oh! Who are you, then? **

_**The spider scurries away as if frightened. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Hold on! I... if you're an upgrade I just need to register you, that's all. Oh, come back! **

_**A red beam of light falling on Raffalo's face tells us the spider has come back. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Ah, there you are. Now, I just need to register your ident. **

_**Another spider joins the first. **_

**RAFFALO: ****Oh, there's two of you! Got yourself a little mate! **_**(giggles) **_**I think I'd better report this to control. How many of you are there? **_**(a third spider appears, and then a fourth) **_**What are you? Oh, no. No. Nooooo! **

_**She is dragged head first into the air vent.**_

Rose hid her head in John's shoulder who comforted her.

_**The steward enters and puts his egg on a nearby table and sits down. He listens to Control speaking. **_

**STEWARD: ****What's that? Well, how should I know? **_**(activates loudspeaker) **_**Would the owner of the blue box in private gallery 15 please report to the steward's office immediately. Guests are reminded that use of **_**all**_** teleportation devices is strictly forbidden under Peace Treaty 5.4/cup/16. Thank you. **

_**While he is talking, a spider has broken out of his egg and runs up the opposite wall. We are shown another shot of the burning sun and the satellite over the Earth. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 25 minutes. Earth Death in 25 minutes**

"Could that be more irritating?" Ianto asked.

_**Rose sits on the steps, throwing the egg up in the air and catching it again when she hears this announcement. **_

**ROSE: ****Oh, thanks. **

_**She puts the egg down and turns her attention to the cutting of Jabe's grandfather. She picks it up. **_

**ROSE: ****Hello! **

Laughter erupted throughout the room. Rose just hid her head in her hands, embarrassed. The laughter went on for about five minutes. Some people muttered words like 'Talking to a twig' and 'Crazy Rose'.

**My name's Rose. That's a sort of plant. We might be related.**

There was more laughter but it was suddenly cut short when Rose gave menacing looks to everyone.

_**She suddenly realizes what she is doing and hurriedly puts the plant down. **_

**ROSE: ****I'm talking to a twig.**

Tiny little bit more laughter as Nine said

"She finally realises what she is doing!"

**__****Behind her, the spider breaks out of the egg. **

"No not Rosie!" Jack yelled at the TV.

_**The TARDIS**__** is being dragged away by some of the staff. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oi, now, careful with that. Park it properly. No scratches. **

"No, we definitely wouldn't want to hurt our precious TARDIS now would we?" Sarah Jane and River asked Eleven and Ten. All the Doctors huffed and looked mildly offended.

**__****One of them walks up to the Doctor, squeaks at him, hands him a card and walks away again. The Doctor reads it - it says 'Have a nice day'. The Doctor looks at the retreating staff's back as if he or she is completely off his or her rocker, and walks off. A few of the metal spiders scurry up the wall behind him. A few more are running along the air vent. The spider that came out of Rose's egg appears to be scanning her hand, but Rose is completely oblivious.**

"What is it with you and your family being completely oblivious?" Gwen asked and Jackie replied

"Well sometimes we are focused on other things and sometimes we just can't be bothered to look."

_**It jumps and runs to the air vent when the Doctor's voice floats through the door. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Rose? Are you in there? **

_**The spider scrambles through the vent just in time, before the Doctor comes through the door. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Aye aye! **_**(sits on other side of stairs) **_**What do you think, then? **

**ROSE: ****Great! Yeah... fine. Once you get past the slightly psychic paper**

_**The Doctor laughs. There is a short pause. **_

**ROSE: ****They're just, so alien. **_**(Doctor looks at her questioningly)**_**The aliens. Are so alien. You look at 'em... and they're alien. **

"You don't say!" Someone said in a sarcastic tone but they didn't know who said it. They all had a feeling it was Jack though.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Good thing I didn't take you to the Deep South. **

**ROSE: **_**(as if looking at him properly for the first time) **_**Where are you from? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****All over the place. **

**ROSE: ****They all speak English. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****No - you just **_**hear**_** English. It's a gift of the TARDIS. Telepathic field, gets inside your brain - translates. **

"Doctor, remember that time we were in that submarine and I thought I was speaking English and I was actually speaking Russian!" Clara laughed along with Eleven.

**ROSE: ****It's inside my brain?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Well, in a good way.**

**ROSE: **_**(colder, starting to sound angry)**_**Your machine gets inside my head. It gets inside and it changes my mind, and you didn't even ask?**

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(thrown) **_**I didn't think about it like that. **

******ROSE: **_**(angrily) **_**No! You were too busy thinking up cheap shots about the Deep South! **

"Ooh, someone's a bit angry!"

******Who are you then, Doctor? What are you called? What sort of alien are you? **

_**The Doctor sits up and looks away from her. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****I'm just The Doctor. **

**ROSE: ****From what planet? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Well, it's not as if you'll know where it is! **

**ROSE: ****Where are you from? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****What does it matter? **

**ROSE: ****Tell me who you are!**

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(suddenly angry) **_**This is who I am, right here, right now, alright? All that counts is here and now, and this is me! **

"Whoa, calm down mate!"

**ROSE: ****Yeah, and I'm here too because you brought me here, so just tell me! **

_**The Doctor gets up and walks down the steps away from her. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 20 minutes. Earth Death in 20 minutes. **

_**After a few moments, Rose gets up and follows the Doctor down the steps. **_

**ROSE: ****Alright... as my mate Shareen says... don't argue with the designated driver**

"Ah Shareen. Always the wise party animal I know and don't like!" Jack said out loud by accident.

"You know Shareen?"

"Course Rosie, who else would be able to keep up with her all night?" He asked with a wink.

_**The Doctor, with his back turned to her, smiles at that. Rose gets her mobile out of her pocket. **_

**ROSE: ****Can't exactly call for a taxi... there's no signal. We're out of range. Just a bit! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Tell you what (h**_**e takes the phone from her) **_**w****ith a little bit of jiggery pokery (h**_**e takes the back off the phone).**_

**ROSE: ****Is that a technical term, 'jiggery pokery'?**

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yeah, I came first in jiggery pokery, what about you? **

**ROSE: ****Nah, failed hullabaloo. **

A few people laughed at that.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oooh. **_**(fits in a new battery, hands phone back to Rose) **_**There you go.**

_**Rose takes it and looks at him uncertainly. He nods. Rose gets her mum's number onto the screen and puts the phone to her ear. It rings. We find ourselves in the Jackie's kitchen, 2005.**_

**JACKIE: ****Hello? **

**ROSE: ****Mum? **

"That was the last phone call I had until you came back." Jackie said sadly and Mickey got up and hugged her. The Doctors looked slightly guilty.

_**Jackie, at home, is putting some washing into the machine. **_

**JACKIE: ****Oh, what is it? What's wrong? What have I done now? Oh, this red top's falling to bits! You should get your money back.**

"Why is money the only thing you go on about?" Someone asked Jackie and she just shrugged her shoulders.

**Go on! There must be something, you**

** never phone in the middle of the day!**

_**Rose laughs. **_

**JACKIE: ****What's so funny? **

**ROSE: ****Nothing! You all right, though? **

**JACKIE: ****Yeah! Why wouldn't I be? **

**ROSE: ****What day is it? **

**JACKIE: ****Wednesday. All day. You got a hangover?**

"Not quite!"

** Oh, I tell you what, put a quid in that lottery syndicate, I'll pay you back later. **

**ROSE: ****Yeah, um, I was just calling 'cause I might be late home. **

**JACKIE: ****Is there something wrong? **

**ROSE: ****No! I'm fine! Top of the world!**

"Hahaha!" Everyone laughed.

_**The Doctor laughs. Jackie puts the phone down. Rose lowers the mobile, stunned. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Think that's amazing, you want to see the bill.**

******ROSE: ****That was 5 billion years ago. So... she's dead now. Five billion years later, my mum's dead.**

"That's nice!"

**********THE DOCTOR: ****Bundle of laughs, you are. **

_**The ship shudders. **_

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(rather happy and curious) **_**That's not supposed to happen**.

**STEWARD: **_**(to control)**_**Well, what was it? I'm just getting green lights at this end. **_**(turns on loudspeaker) **_**Honoured guests may be reassured that gravity pockets may cause slight turbulence, thanking you.**

"That's not a gravity pocket!"

_**As soon as it is switched off again, he speaks angrily to control again. **_

**STEWARD: ****The whole place shook! I felt it! I've hosted all sorts of events on platforms 1, 3, 6 and 15 and I've never felt the slightest tremor. I warn you, if this lot decide to sue... I'm going to scan the infrastructure. **_**(presses a few buttons) **_**What's that? **

_**A spider scurries down the wall behind him.**_

"Uh oh!"

**STEWARD: ****Control, I don't want to worry you, but I'm picking up readings (**_**computer beeps)**_**I have no idea! Well, they're small, and the scan says they're metal **_**(computer beeps - frustrated) **_**I don't know what they look like! **

_**Suddenly, he spots the spider, which is now pottering around on his desk next to his mug.**_

**STEWARD: ****Although, I imagine they might look rather like that... you're not on the guest list... how did you get on board?**

"The eggs!"

_**The spider looks at him almost mockingly and presses a yellow button on the control panel. The computerized woman's voice booms out again. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter deactivated.**

**STEWARD: ****No. No! **

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. **_**The sunfilter does indeed, descend. **_

**STEWARD: **_**(frantic) **_**No! Sunfilter, up! No, no, no! **

_**He fumbles frantically with the buttons on the control panels, but too late. **_

**STEWARD: ****Sunfilter up! Sunfilter up! **

_**Blinding light engulfs the steward. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. **

_**The Steward screams.**_

"Poor steward, he wasn't that bad." Rani said to everyone.

_**Outside the room, the spi**__**der escapes through an air vent. The guests are completely oblivious to the commotion, chatting to each other. The Moxx of Balhoon is talking to the Face of Bo.**_

**MOXX OF BALHOON: T****his is the Bad Wolf scenario.**

The Doctors, Rose and John all looked at each other.

_**The Doctor and Rose enter.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****That wasn't a gravity pocket. I know gravity pockets and they don't feel like that.**

"Exactly what I thought!" Jack and Sarah Jane said at the same time.

_**He is fiddling with a control panel next to the door. Jabe approaches them.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****What do you think, Jabe? Listened to the engines - they pitched up about 30 hertz, is that dodgy or what? **

**JABE: ****It's the sound of metal, it doesn't make any sense to me. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Where's the engine room? **

**JABE: ****I don't know... but the maintenance duct is just behind our guest's suite, I could show you. And **_**(points at Rose)**_**...your wife.**

**THE DOCTOR: ****She's not my wife. **

**JABE: ****Partner? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****No. **

**JABE: ****Concubine? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Nope. **

_**Jabe looks at Rose.**_

**JABE: ****Prostitute?**

"HEY!" Everyone yelled except from Rose and the Doctors.

******ROSE: **_**(insulted) **_**Whatever I am, it must be invisible, do you mind? Tell you what, you two go and pollinate, I'm going to catch up with family. Quick word with Michael Jackson.**

Everyone laughed hard at this. It took about five minutes for everyone to stop laughing.

_**She makes her way over to Cassandra.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Don't start a fight. (P********roffers arm to Jabe) ****I'm all yours.**

**ROSE: **_**(watching them leave)**_**And I want you home by midnight!**

A few people laughed.

_**The Doctor grins back at her.**_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 15 minutes. Earth Death in 15 minutes. **

_**Before the Doctor and Jabe enter, several spiders scurry out of view. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Who's in charge of Platform One? Is there a captain or what? **

**JABE: ****There's just the steward and the staff. **

"Just the staff at that moment actually."

**All the rest is controlled by the metal man. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****You mean the computer? But who controls that? **

**JABE: ****The Corporation. They move Platform One from one artistic event to another. **

_**The Doctor is silent for a moment. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****But there's no one from the corporation on board. **

**JABE: ****They're not needed. This facility is purely automatic. It's the height of the alpha class. Nothing can go wrong. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Unsinkable?**

**JABE: ****If you like. The nautical metaphor is appropriate. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****You're telling me. I was on board another ship once. They said that was unsinkable... I ended up clinging to an iceberg, it wasn't half cold.**

"Trust you to be on the Titanic!"

Eleven, Ten and nine all just smiled innocently.

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(stops a moment) **_**So, what you're saying is, if we get in trouble there's no one to help us out?**

**JABE: ****I'm afraid not. **

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(grinning) **_**Fantastic.**

"How is that fantastic?" Craig asked.

_**He starts walking again. **_

**JABE: ****I don't understand. In what way is THAT fantastic?**

"Exactly what I thought!" Craig said.

_**Behind them, a spider creeps out of its hiding place. Rose is talking to Cassandra. They are looking out of a window at the sun and down at the Earth. **_

**CASSANDRA: ****Soon, the sun will blossom into a red giant, and my home will die. That's where I used to live, when I was a little boy.**

"WHAT?" Everyone that didn't know that Cassandra was male yelled.

"I know right!" Rose said.

**Down there. Mummy and Daddy had a little house built into the side of the Los Angeles Crevice. **_**(sighs) **_**I had such fun. **

**ROSE: ****What happened to everyone else? The Human Race - where did it go?**

"Starship UK." Amy said.

"And other Starships. Remember, Scotland got their own ship because they wanted independence." Eleven replied.

"What the hell are you two going on about?" Martha asked.

"You'll find out in a bit." Eleven told her.

**CASSANDRA: ****They say Mankind has touched every star in the sky. **

**ROSE: ****So, you're NOT the last human.**

"Nope"

**CASSANDRA: ****I am the last PURE human. The others... mingled. (Disgusted) ****Oh, they call themselves 'New Humans' and 'Proto-humans' and 'Digi-humans' even 'Human-ish' but you know what I call them? **_**(lowers her voice to a whisper) **_**Mongrels.**

"I met a "Mongrel" before, a bit of a bad one in bed!" Jack said.

"JACK!" A few people yelled.

**ROSE: ****Right. And you stayed behind?**

**CASSANDRA: ****I kept myself pure. **

**ROSE: ****How many operations have you had? **

**CASSANDRA: ****708. Next week, it's 709, I'm having my blood bleached. Is that why you wanted a word? You could be flatter, Rose. You've got a little bit of a chin poking out. **

**ROSE: I'd rather die.**

**CASSANDRA: ****Honestly, it doesn't hurt—**

**ROSE: ****No, I mean it. I'd rather die. It's better to die than live like you - a bitchy trampoline.**

"Whoo!" Jack yelled and a few people cheered. The rest just laughed.

**CASSANDRA: ****Oh well. What do you know. **

**ROSE: ****I was born on that planet. And so was my mum, and so was my dad and that makes me officially the last human being in this room, 'cause you're not human. You've had it all nipped and tucked and flattened till there's nothing left. Anything human got chucked in the bin. You're just skin, Cassandra. Lipstick and skin. Nice talking.**

"Haha! Nice one Rose!" Jenny said, laughing.

_**She walks off. The Adherents of the Repeated Meme watch her leave through the sliding doors. The Doctor and Jabe are still making their way down the corridor, the low ceiling forcing them to stoop slightly.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****So, tell me, Jabe. What's a tree like you doing in a place like this? **

**JABE: ****Respect for the Earth. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh, come on. Everyone on this platform's worth zillions.**

**JABE: ****Well... perhaps it's a case of having to be seen at the right occasions. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****In case your share prices drop? I know you lot. You've got massive forests everywhere, roots everywhere, and there's always money in land.**

**JABE: ****All the same. You respect the Earth as family. So many species evolved from that planet. Mankind is only one. I'm another. My ancestors were transplanted from the planet down below. And I'm a direct descendant of the tropical rainforest.**

"That's so cool!" Clyde said, impressed.

_**The Doctor looks impressed. He then points to a control panel. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Excuse me. **

_**He gets out his sonic screwdriver and starts poking the screen with it.**_

**JABE: ****And what about your ancestry, Doctor? Perhaps you could tell a story or two... perhaps a man only enjoys trouble when there's nothing else left... **_**(no answer) **_**I scanned you earlier. The metal machine had trouble identifying your species - refused to admit your existence. **

_**The Doctor pretends to be concentrating on the scan, but a flicker of emotion passes across his face.**_

**JABE: ****And even when it named you, I wouldn't believe it. But it was right. **

_**The Doctor stops scanning. Deep sadness is reflected in his eyes. Jabe's tone is hushed, awed.**_

**JABE: ****I know where you're from. Forgive me for intruding, but it's remarkable that you even exist. I just want to say... how sorry I am.**

_**Jabe puts a comforting hand on his arm. **__****__**The Doctor's eyes are filled with tears. He places his hand over hers, and a tear falls down his cheek.**_

"Why are you crying?" Gwen asked. The Doctors just shook their head and Ten pointed to the screen as if to say watch.

_**He quickly finishes the scan and he and Jabe go through a door. The Doctor and Jabe find themselves in the ventilation chamber. There are huge fans circulating in there. The Doctor looks down at Jabe. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Is it me, or is it a bit nippy? **

_**Rose walks alone down a corridor. The Adherents of the Repeated Meme are coming from the other end. She smiles at them, but the front one strikes her to the ground where she lies unconscious as they drag her from view.**_

"Why is it always you who gets dragged away?" Nine asked Rose. She just shrugged her shoulders.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Fair do's, though, that's a great bit of air conditioning. Sort of, nice and old fashioned. Bet they call it 'retro'. **_**(scans another control panel with his sonic screwdriver) **_**Gotcha. **

_**The panel falls off and a spider scuttles out and scurries across the floor and up the wall. The Doctor and Jabe watch it. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****What the hell's that?**

**JABE: ****Is it part of the 'retro'? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****I don't think so. Hold on. **

_**He points the screwdriver at the spider. However, Jabe fires something up at the spider, disabling it. It comes falling into the Doctor's hand. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Hey! Nice liana!**

**JABE: ****Thank you! We're not supposed to show them in public. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Don't worry, I won't tell anybody. **_**(turns his attention to the spider) **_**Now then. Who's been bringing the pets on board?**

"The adherents of the repeated meme!"

"Thanks Rory, I do figure it out in a minute." Eleven said in a sarcastic tone.

**JABE: ****What does it do? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sabotage.**

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 10 minutes. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****And the temperature's about to rocket. Come on. **

_**They hurry from the chamber. The aliens mill about. **_

**CASSANDRA: ****The planet's end. Come gather! Come gather! Bid farewell to the cradle of civilization. Let us mourn her with a traditional ballad. **

_**Britney Spears' Toxic suddenly blasts out of the enormous 'iPod'. **_

"Traditional ballad? Not what I would have chosen!" Ianto said and Jack stifled a laugh.

_**The Doctor and Jabe hurry along - the corridor is filled with smoke and the staff are coughing squeaky little coughs. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Come on! _(he says to Jabe)_ ****Get back!**

_**He moves his sonic screwdriver over another control panel. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter rising. Sunfilter rising. **

**JABE: **_**(concerned)**_** Was the Steward in there? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****You can smell him. **

"That's nice!" Someone said sarcastically.

**Hold on - there's another sun filter program to descend.**

_**'Toxic' plays loudly as Rose wakes up, rubbing her head. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. Sunfilter descending. **

_**Rose sits up in alarm as the Sunfilter descends. She runs to the door and knocks on it frantically. **_

**ROSE: ****Let me out! **

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. **

_**The Doctor runs along the corridor. **_

**ROSE: ****Let me out! Let me out! **

_**The Doctor arrives outside the door to attempt to make the Sunfilter rise again. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Anyone in there?**

**ROSE: **_**(frantically) **_**Let me out! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh, well, it would be you.**

"It always is the companion!" Eleven exclaimed with a huff.

**ROSE: ****Open the door! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Hold on! Give us two ticks!**

_**The whole room is smoking. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. Sunfilter descending. **

_**The display on the control panel says 'Sunfilter Rising'. The Doctor looks up expectantly.**_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter rising. Sunfilter rising. **

_**The Doctor looks pleased with himself. Rose sighs with relief.**_

"Rosie is safe!" Jack said looking relieved.

"Jack, you know I'm right here right!" Rose said looking slightly confused and amused.

"Oh yeah..."

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter rising... Sunfilter descending. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****This is just what we need. The computer's getting clever.**

**ROSE: ****Will you stop mucking about!**

"Not my fault!" Nine said looking at Rose.

"Sorry!"

**THE DOCTOR: ****I'm not mucking about, it's fighting back!**

**ROSE: ****Open the door! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Hang on! **

_**Rose runs down the stairs and flattens herself to the floor.**_

"Good idea!" Jenny said.

**ROSE: ****The locks melted! **

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter descending. Sunfilter descending. **

_**The Doctor jabs his sonic screwdriver right inside the wires. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Sunfilter rising. Sunfilter rising. **

_**Panting, Rose runs back to the door. The Doctor cannot open it. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****The whole thing's jammed. I can't open the doors. Stay there! Don't move!**

**ROSE: **_**(terrified sort of sarcasm)**_**Where're am I gonna go? Ipswich?**

"Haha!"

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 5 minutes.**

"That's still annoying!"

**JABE: **_**(looking at her computer)**_**The metal machine confirms. The spider devices have infiltrated the whole of platform one. **

**CASSANDRA: ****How's that possible? Our private rooms are protected by a code wall. Moisturize me, moisturize me. **

_**The Doctor takes the destabilized spider out of Jabe's hand. **_

**MOXX OF BALHOON: ****Summon the Steward! **

**JABE: ****I'm afraid the Steward is dead. **

_**There is a general gasp of shock. **_

**MOXX OF BALHOON: ****Who killed him?**

**CASSANDRA: ****This whole event was sponsored by the Face of Bo! He invited us! **_**(Face of Bo shakes his head) **_**Talk to the face! Talk to the face!**

"HEY! Don't blame the face. He's innocent, always is!" Jack yelled at the TV whilst everyone that knew he was the Face of Bo coughed loudly. Jack looked at them

"What?"

"Always innocent?" Martha asked with a smile.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Easy way of finding out. Someone bought a little pet on board. **_**(shows them the spider) **_**Let's send him back to Master. **

_**He places the spider down on the floor. The spider scuttles along to Cassandra and looks up at her. Cassandra looks shifty for a moment, but the spider moves on to the feet of the Adherents of the Repeated Meme. **_

**CASSANDRA: ****The Adherents of the Repeated Meme. J'accuse! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****That's all very well, and really kind of obvious, but if you stop and think about it.**

"The repeated meme is just and idea!" River whispered and turned to look at Eleven who nodded.

_**The Adherents of the Repeated Meme tries to strike him, but he catches its arm and rips it off.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****A Repeated Meme is just an idea. And that's all they are. An idea. **

_**He rips a wire out of the arm and all of the Adherents of the Repeated Meme crumple into a bundle of black cloaks. Everyone gasps. Cassandra rolls her eyes.**_

"So I have a feeling who the real culprit is!" Luke said with a slight smile.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Remote controlled Droids. Nice little cover for the **_**real**_** troublemaker. Go on, Jimbo!**

"Jimbo? Of all the things you could call it you called it Jimbo?" Donna asked.

"Jimbo's a cool name!" Nine exclaimed to Donna

_**(nudges spider with his foot)**_**Go home! **

_**The spider ambles back over to Cassandra. **_

**CASSANDRA: ****I bet you were the school swot and never got kissed.**

"Actually I was captain of the Galifreyan Football Team and everyone wanted to be my date for prom. God that was a hard decision on who to take!" Eleven started to ramble.

"You have football on Galifrey? And prom?" Angie asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Oh yes. You would be surprised. On Galifrey we have a lot of things you have except for you have different versions. For example, our football is like your cricket!" Ten replied. Some people around the room shared a few confused looks but ignored them and continued to watch the episode.

_**The Doctor raises his eyebrows. **_

**CASSANDRA: ****At arms! **

_**The two bodyguards with canisters on either side of her raise their canisters. **_

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(mockingly)**_**What are you going to do, moisturize me?**

"Haha! Nice one Doc!" Jack laughed.

******CASSANDRA: ****With acid. Oh, too late anyway. My spiders have control of the mainframe. Oh, you all carried them as gifts, tax free, past every code wall. I'm not just as pretty face.**

There was one very loud sarcastic cough from Strax. A few people laughed.

**THE DOCTOR: ****Sabotaging a ship while you're still inside it? How stupid's that?**

**CASSANDRA: ****I'd hoped to manufacture a hostage situation with myself as one of the victims. The compensation would have been enormous. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Five billion years and it still comes down to money**.

"Always does and always will Doctor." Amy told him.

**CASSANDRA: ****Do you think it's cheap, looking like this? Flatness costs a fortune. I am The Last Human, Doctor. Me. Not that freaky little kid of yours. **

**MOXX OF BALHOON: ****Arrest her! **

**CASSANDRA: ****Oh, shut it, pixie. I've still got my final option. **

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 3 minutes. **

**CASSANDRA: ****And here it comes. You're just as useful dead, all of you. I have shares in your rival companies and they'll triple in price as soon as you're dead. My spiders are primed and ready to destroy the safety systems. How did that old Earth song go? "Burn, baby, burn."**

"Disco Inferno!" A few people sang and the rest laughed.

**JABE: ****Then you'll burn with us. **

**CASSANDRA: ****Oh, I'm so sorry. I know the use of teleportation is strictly forbidden, but... I'm such a naughty thing. Spiders - activate. **

_**There are a series of explosions around the ship.**_

**CASSANDRA: ****Force fields gone with the planet about to explode. At least it'll be quick. Just like my fifth husband. **_**(giggles) **_**Oh, shame on me. Buh-bye, darlings! Buh-bye, my darlings**

_**She and her bodyguards teleport out. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels rising. **

**MOXX OF BALHOON: ****Reset the computer! **

**JABE: ****Only the Steward would know how. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****No. We can do it by hand. There must be a system restore switch. Jabe, come on. **

_**They leave the room. He calls back the crowd over his shoulder. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****You lot - just chill!**

"Of all the things you could have said it had it was to chill in that heat!" Clara said. Eleven just smiled.

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Earth Death in 2 minutes. Earth Death in 2 minutes.**

_**Jabe and the Doctor are running back through the maintenance corridor.**_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - critical. Heat levels - critical. **

_**The Doctor and Jabe reach the ventilation chamber. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Oh. And guess where the switch is. **

_**The switch is located at the other side of the enormous fans.**_

"Good luck getting to that Doc!" Jack said.

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - rising. Heat levels - rising. **

_**The Doctor pulls a lever down and the fans slow down. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****External temperature - 5 thousand degrees. **

_**As soon as the Doctor lets go of the lever, the fans start to speed up again. As the Doctor looks hopelessly at the fans, Jabe pulls the lever down again and holds it there.**_

**THE DOCTOR: ****You can't. The heat's going to vent through this place. **

**JABE: ****I know. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Jabe, you're made of wood. **

**JABE: ****Then stop wasting time. Time Lord.**

"Nice one Jabe!" Jackie said.

_**He grins at her and runs back to the fans. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - rising. Heat levels - rising. **

_**The glass begins to crack. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - hazardous.**

**MOXX OF BALHOON: ****We're going to die!**

"Please don't tell me the Face dies!" Jack accidentally said out loud.

"He doesn't die because Martha has met him and remember he is immortal like you. Actually he did die but not for a while." Eleven rambled on.

"Okay, you were right. He does like to ramble on in this body!" Martha said to River, Amy, Rory, Clara, Angie and Artie. Eleven just looked offended and the rest smiled.

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - hazardous. **

_**The Doctor dodges the first fan and runs underneath it. He looks anxiously up at the next one. The glass begins to crack. Rose cowers against the wall. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Shields malfunctioning. Shields malfunctioning. **

_**Rays of sun blast in through the cracks, burning holes in the parts of the metal wall they hit. Rose screams. The Doctor is still standing before the second fan. He looks back at Jabe who is sweating and breathing heavily. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - critical. Heat levels - critical. **

_**The Doctor dodges under the second fan. The glass cracks further, engulfing the Moxx of Balhoon in light. He cries out. **_

"Poor Moxx of Balhoon." Someone said.

_**The sunrays hit the wall either side of Rose. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Heat levels - rising. Heat levels - rising. **

_**As the Doctor stands before the third fan. Jabe starts shaking violently. Suddenly, she gasps as one of her hands catches fire. She screams.**_

"Not Jabe!" Ianto said, slightly upset. Everyone agreed with him.

_**The Doctor looks back, shocked. Now there is no one to hold the lever down, the fans circulate so fast that they can hardly be seen, in order to cool the ship down. It is impossible for the Doctor to get through. The walls around Rose are rapidly burning.**_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Planet explodes in 10... 9... **

_**The Doctor closes his eyes. All grows quiet. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****8... 7... 6... 5... 4... **

_**The Doctor, still with his eyes closed, steps calmly though the fan. **_

"Only you would be able to do that!" Luke exclaimed with a laugh.

_**When at the other side, he opens his eyes and dashes to the switch, pulling it down. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Raise shields! **

_**Rose has her eyes closed and is shaking. **_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****...1 **

_**The force fields around the ships are reset just as the planet is engulfed in fire. It explodes, leaving the ship completely unharmed.**_

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Exoglass repair. Exoglass repair. **

_**The glass is automatically repaired. Rose opens her eyes, panting heavily. The Doctor walks back through the fans. He pauses for a moment to look sadly at the charred and smoking remains of Jabe. Rose walks back into the observation gallery, where all the aliens are sitting around, wounded or dead. The Doctor walks briskly in a few moments later. He glances at Rose but does not pause to talk to her. Instead he goes straight to Jabe's companions, mutters a few words to them and then places his hands on their shoulders, leaving them to grieve. He then walks back near Rose. **_

**ROSE: ****You all right? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Yeah, I'm fine. I'm full of ideas, I'm bristling with them.**

"Oh god what's he doing now?" Mickey asked. Rose told him to just watch.

**Idea number one - teleportation through five thousand degrees needs some kind of feed. Idea number two - this feed must be hidden nearby. **

_**He strides over to the ostrich egg, breaks it open and the teleportation feed falls out.**_

"Lucky it was in there or you would have looked like a right idiot!" Rory laughed. A few people laughed and agreed with him and the Doctors just looked slightly offended.

_** He picks it up. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****Idea number three - if you're as clever as me, then a teleportation feed can be reversed. **

_**He twists the feed. Cassandra appears before them, apparently in the middle of gloating.**_

**CASSANDRA: ****Ah, you should have seen their little alien faces. **_**(notices her new surroundings) **_**Oh. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****The Last Human. **

**CASSANDRA: **_**(flustered)**_**so. You passed my little test. Bravo. This makes you eligible to join the er... the human club.**

"Sound positively marvellous. Is there a space for me?" Jack asked. Ianto and Gwen laughed and the rest just smiled.

**THE DOCTOR: ****People have died, Cassandra. You murdered them. **

**CASSANDRA: ****That depends on your definition of 'people'. And that's enough of a technicality to keep your lawyers dizzy for centuries. Take me to court then, Doctor! And watch me smile, and cry, and flutter... **

**THE DOCTOR: ****And creak?**

"And what?" A few people asked.

**CASSANDRA: ****And what? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Creak! You're creaking. **

_**Cassandra's skin is tightening. Her eyes are becoming bloodshot and she is getting whiter and whiter. **_

**CASSANDRA: **_**(panicking)**_**What? Ah! Ah! I'm drying out! Oh, sweet heavens! Moisturize me! Moisturize me! Where are my surgeons? My lovely boys! It's too hot! **

_**She's covered in red blotches. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****You raised the temperature.**

**CASSANDRA: **_**(terrified, pathetic)**_**Have pity! Moisturize me! Oh, Doctor! **

**ROSE: **_**(shaken)**_**Help her. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****Everything has its time and everything dies. **

**CASSANDRA: **_**(shrivelling up)**_**I'm... too... **_**young!**_

_**She explodes. The Doctor looks completely cold and not remotely fazed. He leaves the room.**_

"Okay, so you have changed a lot since then!" Donna said and Wilf nodded his head.

"That was right after the Time War, I had only just come back from killing people." Nine said and the other two Doctors agreed.

**COMPUTER VOICE: ****Shuttles 4 and 6 departing. This unit now closing down for maintenance.**

_**The Manchester Suite is now completely empty apart from Rose, who is standing at the window watching the Earth burn with a very vulnerable and sad look on her face, oblivious to the Doctor watching her from the doorway. Rocks fly past the window. She turns around when she hears the Doctor's footsteps as he comes to stand beside her. **_

**ROSE: **_**(tearfully) **_**The end of the Earth. It's gone. And we were too busy saving ourselves, no one saw it go.**

"Well, if you hadn't been saving yourself, no one would have been alive to see it go." Madame Vastra said and he agreed with him.

_**(the Doctor looks down at her) **_**All those years... all that history and no one was even looking. It's just...**

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(holds his hand out to her)**_**Come with me. **

_**Rose takes his hand and they walk away together. Back in 2005, Rose steps out of the TARDIS. She looks around at the crowds, seeing them in a new light. The Doctor stands beside her. **_

**BIG ISSUE SELLER: ****Big issue! **

**THE DOCTOR: ****You think it'll last forever. People, and cars and concrete. But it won't. One day, it's all gone. Even the sky. **_**(they both look at the sky. After a moment -) **_**My planet's gone.**

"So that's why you were crying!" Gwen said in understanding.

_**Rose turns to look at him. This is the first time he's mentioned his home. **_

**THE DOCTOR: ****It's dead. It burned like the Earth. It's just rocks and dust. Before it's time.**

**ROSE: ****What happened? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****There was a war. And we lost.**

"I thought everyone lost?" Sarah Jane asked. Eleven nodded his head in answer to the question.

**ROSE: ****A war with who? **

_**He doesn't answer, seemingly lost in thought. **_

**ROSE: ****What about your people? **

**THE DOCTOR: ****I'm a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords. **

Martha, Jack, Ten, Eleven and Wilf all coughed very loudly. Everyone looked at them, questioningly.

**They're all gone. I'm the only survivor. I'm left travelling on my own because there's no one else. **

******ROSE: ****There's me**

**THE DOCTOR: ****You've seen how dangerous it is. Do you want to go home? **

_**Rose looks at him for a few seconds. **_

**ROSE: ****I don't know. I want... **_**(sniffs the air) **_**Oh! Can you smell chips?**

"Not answering the question!" Amy laughed.

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(laughs)**_**Yeah. Yeah! **

**ROSE: ****I want chips. **

**THE DOCTOR: **_**(smiling)**_**Me too.**

**ROSE: ****Right then, before you get me back in that box, chips it is, and you can pay. **

**THE DOCTOR: ****No money.**

"But you always have money!" River exclaimed.

"Not human currency." Ten replied before Eleven had the chance to.

**ROSE: ****What sort of date are you? Come on then, tightwad, chips are on me. **

_**He smiles at her, delighted. **_

**ROSE: ****We've only got five billion years before the shops close**

"Haha!" Most people laughed.

_**They walk down the street together laughing, Rose nuzzling her head against his shoulder.**_

**The End**

"Oh, I can't wait for the next episode!" Artie exclaimed. At that moment the next episode started.

**DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW**

So what do you think? Leave a review and I will update the next chapter quicker.


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